Mastering Discomfort: Your Journey to Self-Improvement - Deepstash

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Do you have Zone Control?

Do you have Zone Control?

What situations come into your mind when youΒ think about discomfort?

  • You would like to contact someone, but don't because you haven't for a long time.
  • You would like to share your constructive criticism at work, but don't want to feel rejected.
  • Or you would like to be able to pet a dog to start a little talk with the owner, but don't feel certain.

That are just some examples for more introverted people like myself, but everyone has their own comfort- and discomfort zones.

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How do you act on your Discomfort?

How do you act on your Discomfort?

Discomfort can be caused by a mixture of emotions like

  • Uncertainty - How will someone react to my action?
  • Worries - What will someone think about me after taking this action?
  • Fear - Will I be rejected, because of taking this action?

All subforms of anxiety and shame.

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The consequences of Stress

The consequences of Stress

Anxiety and shame cause a stress response in our bodies. The extent and that's why also the consequences of this stress response depends on our perception.

  • An extrovert might not perceive the earlier mentioned example-situations as stress
  • While an introvert might even avoid social situations (fight or flight) in the first place

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A quote that can change your Perception*

A quote that can change your Perception*

Do one thing everyday, that scares you. – Eleanor Roosevelt

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*in longterm with habitual practice.

When we collect more experience with our age, some realise that changing our view, values, habits etc. wasn't and won't ever come easy, but gets harder with age tendentionally.

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Why change is easier for Children?

Why change is easier for Children?

Children feel less discomfort of taking action, because in their early life stage they are less capable of thinking about the possible scary or emberassing consequences of their actions (less anxiety & shame). Their few life experiences make them less able to anticipate. Instead they focus more on the present than the future.

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What's the difference between Introverts and Extroverts?

What's the difference between Introverts and Extroverts?

  • Introverts think more likely about the consequences, the reactio, of their actions (future focus)
  • Extroverts think more likely about the action itself (present focus) or are more stoic about their thoughts focusing possible future outcomes
  • Those extroverts who notice a stress response, but react calmly, are more likely to have learned it intentionally with self-awareness.

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How can that quote change your Perception?

How can that quote change your Perception?

Do you know Mel Robbins' "5 second rule"?

If not, the key is to distract your brain from your discomforting emotions, with her advice by counting from 5 to 1 and then act.

It works for some people, because logic (counting backwards) activates different brain regions than when perceiving your emotions, which can get in the way of taking action.

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Why considering the Quote?

Why considering the Quote?

The quote does at least three things to help you being more in the present moment

  1. Distracting you from discomfort
  2. Creating a potential habit of dealing with discomfort
  3. Additionaly creates self-awareness of what causes your discomfort

1. & 2. are the same benefits form the 5 sec rule. I can recommend the Deepstash articles about it ;)

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Your growing companion Self-Awareness

Your growing companion Self-Awareness

Being aware of your own perception can help to identify your own emotions better. When you ask yourself in response of the quote – Why am I scared?

You rationalise your emotions and question them to be appropriate or not. Your learn more about yourself.

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Your own Best Friend

Your own Best Friend

When you learn and understand yourself better, you are more considerate and compassionate with yourself.

It will be easier for you to find more reasons to act than not to act on your discomfort, because when you repeatly make the decision to overcome it, it might become a habit.

Your brain adapts. The stress response reduces and it becomes easier to focus on the present.

A best friend gives you good advice, because her/his emotional stress response don't cloud their mind staying rational.

Self-awareness in situations of discomfort might help you to become your own best friend.

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Kaizen

Kaizen

means - change to become better.

If you decide to do one thing a day that scares you, better start small.

Small steps of change bring compound success in longterm without being overwhelmed quickly, because your brain gets the time to adapt to your new strategy to turn active cognitive chosen changes into passive automated habits.

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Hone your progress of Change

Hone your progress of Change

Mastery doesn't come overnight. Mastery takes time.

A basic principle is – The more time you spend on something, the more competence you grow in that area.

Documenting the situations, where you overcame your discomfort with grattitude briefly and daily in a notebook increases the amount of practice to consolidate your initial change into a habit with thought structured writing.

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Note – Self-reflection

Note – Self-reflection

The quote in this article changed the way I perceive and act on my zone of discomfort. Today, discomfort is my emotional indicator for where I still have or want to grow. But I try to avoid becoming an self-optimisation addict (other form of stress compensation).

Before habitually or blindly acting on every discomfort, you can ask yourself, does it make me happier overcoming it?

I'm happy to be an introvert, because it has benefits and that fits my values.

Self-awareness can also help you evaluating every change you plan to make based on your own definition of happiness.

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<p>What works for my zone cont...

What works for my zone control doesn't have to work for you. We all come in diversity. Remember this before you comment. I just share my personal experiences and don't guarantee anything. With that in mind

Thank you for your understanding and your attention!

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Choose your Takeaway Mindset-Cycle

Choose your Takeaway Mindset-Cycle

Comfort - Inaction - Inexperience - Inability.

Discomfort - Action - Experience* - Ability.

*incl. failures

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CURATED BY

gerald

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CURATOR'S NOTE

This article adresses a possible approach of getting more life-control about discomfort causing situations. It covers the importance of perception as a key for change and integrates common concepts like the "5 second rule", self-awareness, habitualization, "Kaizen" and self-reflection, while contrasting an introverted mindset with an extroverted one.

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