Bhasker Bhasker's Key Ideas from The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
by Mark Manson

The point isn't to get away from the shit. The point is to find the shit you enjoy dealing with.

If there is nothing to fuck with then mind automatically gives fucks about meaning less things.

Choosing what's important and what's is not.

This book will teach you to turn your pain into a tool and your problems slightly into better problems. That is a real progress. Think of it Some guide to suffer for meaningful problems.

Happiness comes from solving problems. The keyword here is "solving". If you're are avoiding your problems or feel like you don't have any problems, then you're going to make yourself miserable. If you feel like you have problems that you can't solve, you like wise make yourself miserable. The secret sauce here is in the solving the problems, not in not having problems on the first place.

Everyone desires happiness, success, love, and a fulfilling life. It’s easy to dream about these things—they’re inherently enjoyable and universally appealing. But the real question isn’t what you want in life; it’s what struggles you’re willing to endure to achieve those desires. That willingness, more than ambition or talent, determines your success and fulfillment. The same is true for relationships. A meaningful connection requires enduring tough conversations, heartbreaks, and emotional ups and downs. In the end what defines you isn’t what you want but what you’re willing to suffer for.

Relying on happiness as a goal often backfires because emotions are fleeting. What brings joy today loses its charm tomorrow, as we constantly crave more—a new house, relationship, or pay raise. This endless pursuit leaves us feeling as we started: unfulfilled. True contentment lies not in chasing fleeting emotions but in finding meaning beyond them.

Fleeting: is short-lived or temporary.

The true measurement of self worth is not how a person feels about her positive experiences but rather how she feels about her negative experiences.

People whos thoughts are highly upon them are generally performed better and have caused by fewer problems

Author says; "my lack of confidence compounds, unconfidence about my sounding unconfident making me more unconfirndent. That fucking feedback Loop from hell."

The deeper the pain, the more helpless we feel against our problems.

The truth is that there's no such thing as a personal problem. If you've got a problem, chances are millions of other people have had it in the past, have it now, and are going to have it in the future. Likely people you know too. That doesn't minimize the problem or mean that it shouldn't hurt. It doesn't mean a victim.

There in two ways;

1. I'm awesome and the rest of you all suck, so i deserve special treatment.

2. I suck and the rest of you are all awesome, so I deserve a special treatment.

These both statements are opposite mindsets, but the same selfish ness creamy core in the middle.

The more we see opinions that differ from ours, the more upset we get that those opinions exist. The easier our lives become, the more we feel we deserve even better.

To become truly great at something, you have to dedicate shit-tons of time and energy to it.

This constant steam of unrealistic media dogpiles onto our existing feelings of insecurity, by overexposing us to the unrealistic standards we fail to live up to.

Technology has solved old economic problems by giving us new physchologies problems. The internet has not just open sourced information; it also open sourced insecurity, self-doubt and shame.

You will have a growing appreciation for life's basic experiences such things as helping people, reading a good book, laughing with some one

If suffering is inevitable, if our problems in life are un- avoidable, then the question we should be asking is not "How do I stop suffering?" but "Why am I suffering-for what purpose?"

The nature of our problems determines the quality of our lives.

People may perceive that they feel lonely. But when they ask themselves why they feel lonely, they tend to come up with a way to blame others everyone else is mean, or no one is cool or smart enough to understand them and thus they further avoid their problem instead of seeking to solve. We get control of problem based on how we choose, think,measure

Often the only difference between a problem being painful or powerful is a sense that we chose it and that we are responsible for it.

 blaming others means pointing fingers, but taking responsibility means owning your reactions and choices. Others might cause your problems, but only you can control how you feel about them. You decide how to see, react to, and measure your experiences.

Taking responsibility always important that is called real learning, blaming others simply is hurting yourself.

Example as genetics is not their fault but it's still their responsibility.

In poker, only consistent best choices can make a player win the game than players with best cards.

Growth is endless iterative process from going wrong to slightly less wrong and then less wrong to again less wrong than that, we are always in the process of approaching truth and perfection without actually ever reaching them.

Many people become so obsessed with being "right" about their life's that they never end up actually living it.

Being wrong opens up to the possibility of change. Being wrong brings the opportunity of growth.

The opness to being wrong must exist for any real change is growth to take place.

Our brain is always trying to make sense of our current situation based on what we already believe and have already experienced. Every new piece of informa- tion is measured against the values and conclusions we already have. As a result, our brain is always biased toward what we feel to be true'in that moment.

the more you try to be certain about something, the more uncertain and insecure you will feel.

The more you embrace being uncertain and not knowing, the more comfortable you will feel in knowing what you don't know.