Live for Your Eulogy, Not Your Obituary
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The Five Human Fears
Human beings have five fears that are relatively common:
- Fear Of Death.
- Fear Of Injury or mutilation.
- Loss of Freedom and Autonomy.
- Fear of separation coming from loss, rejection or abandonment.
- Fear of the Ego-death, from shame or humiliation.
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New Aspects of Fear During a Crisis
The global pandemic has surfaced a peculiar fear of not being able to communicate with one’s family and friends before our(sudden) death.
The fear of not being able to say goodbye, or to not be able to speak the parting words of love and forgiveness.
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Obituary Vs Eulogy
- An obituary is a formal ‘public resume’ of a life that has now ended. It can include details like the place of birth, location, work and the names of the surviving family members. It is like a LinkedIn profile along with the Facebook profile picture.
- A eulogy(pronounced You-luh-jee), by contrast, is about sharing memories, stories, quirks and the human element of the deceased. It captures the legacy and impact of the deceased.
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Writing Your Eulogy
- Normally, a eulogy is written by a loved one after someone’s demise.
- By writing one’s own eulogy while one is still alive and breathing, the process is reverse-engineered and a self-commitment is made to live a courageous life, which is true to one’s ideals.
- It is not an exercise to make one feel depressed but to understand the goals, values and desires of one’s life.
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Tips On Penning Your Eulogy
- What you do everyday matters the most to your loved ones, especially children. If your everyday, mundane activities make others feel loved, you will be remembered for them.
- If the values that you claim to have are just on paper, then certain specific habits need to be developed to incorporate those values in your life. Your eulogy has to be truthful, not simply a collection of inspirational quotes that are not implemented by you.
- The gap between the story in your eulogy and your current story is your opportunity to change.
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