Three Steps - to politely tell people you're not available right now: <ol><li>Acknowledge and honor the person’s presence.</li><li>When the person inquires, stop and listen to the request.</li><li>Politely decline in the present moment by stating your attention is currently elsewhere. Follow by saying once your available, you will respond.</li></ol>Remember, all people want is to be seen and heard while setting expectations.

Three Steps To Let Someone Know You're Busy

<figure><img alt="On a spaceship, an astronaut, sitting alongside extraterrestrial monsters, travel in total relaxation reading a book. Concept of space transport, surrealism, future, new worlds." src="https://miro.medium.com/max/500/1*CBJh9noJk4xjAoQb-RbAMg.jpeg" width="785" height="442"><figcaption class="iq ir cy cw cx is it cd b fx cf cg" data-selectable-paragraph="" dir="ltr">Yeah, sorry, I can’t talk right now, I’m busy in transit | Image By <a href="https://www.shutterstock.com/g/Futurframes" class="cj iu" rel="noopener nofollow" dir="ltr">HQuality</a>, Shutterstock</figcaption></figure>This week I witnessed a scene of a missed interaction followed by a feeling of rejection. What do I mean by this? A young lady joined a <a rel="noopener" href="https://medium.com/beingwell/what-is-gestalt-psychotherapy-part-1-6dab07f317f7" dir="ltr">Gestalt psychotherapy</a> Zoom meeting early and casually spoke with the facilitators. But the facilitators were nervous and in the middle of preparing for a public workshop. When the young lady asked if someone could support her to become more present, the facilitators continued to speak to one another about their presentation. The woman left feeling activated with sensations of rejection and hurt.When someone requests our attention, yet our focus is elsewhere, how can we politely tell the person we’re busy?<OL><LI>Acknowledge and honor the person’s presence.</LI><LI>When the person inquires, stop and listen to the request.</LI><LI>Politely decline in the present moment by stating your attention is currently elsewhere. Follow by saying once your available, you will respond.</LI></OL>Common sense is the underlying message of the above three steps, yet, you’d be surprised how often we forget to acknowledge, stop, listen and defer until available. And the process takes effort and practice. What requestors are asking for is a fundamental human need to feel ‘seen and heard.’ The response, in return, fulfills that demand while establishing a timeline for availability — and following through with the ask.When people feel rejected, we must remember that a trauma response is triggered within the body for some people, recalling past pain and dismissal. And for this young woman, the evidence of something far deeper and more emotionally substantial was quite evident in her tears.Sure, sometimes we all feel like aliens on a bus, at times closed off to the rest of humanity due to our internal focus. By acknowledging the presence of others, and seeing and hearing the people around us while setting boundaries and expectations, is a mutually beneficial experience for everyone.More like this:

This week I witnessed a scene of a missed interaction followed by a feeling of rejection. What do I mean by this? A young lady joined a Gestalt psychotherapy Zoom meeting early and casually spoke…

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This week I witnessed a scene of a missed interaction followed by a feeling of rejection. What do I mean by this? A young lady joined a <a dir="ltr" href="https://medium.com/beingwell/what-is-gestalt-psychotherapy-part-1-6dab07f317f7" rel="noopener">Gestalt psychotherapy </a>Zoom meeting early and casually spoke with the facilitators. But the facilitators were nervous and in the middle of preparing for a public workshop. When the young lady asked if someone could support her to become more present, the facilitators continued to speak to one another about their presentation. The woman left feeling activated with sensations of rejection and hurt.

<ol><li>Acknowledge and honor the person’s presence. </li><li>When the person inquires, stop and listen to the request. </li><li>Politely decline in the present moment by stating your attention is currently elsewhere. Follow by saying once your available, you will respond. </li> </ol>

Common sense is the underlying message of the above three steps, yet, you’d be surprised how often we forget to acknowledge, stop, listen and defer until available. And the process takes effort and practice. What requestors are asking for is a fundamental human need to feel ‘seen and heard.’ The response, in return, fulfills that demand while establishing a timeline for availability — and following through with the ask.

When people feel rejected, we must remember that a trauma response is triggered within the body for some people, recalling past pain and dismissal. And for this young woman, the evidence of something far deeper and more emotionally substantial was quite evident in her tears.

Sure, sometimes we all feel like aliens on a bus, at times closed off to the rest of humanity due to our internal focus. By acknowledging the presence of others, and seeing and hearing the people around us while setting boundaries and expectations, is a mutually beneficial experience for everyone.

More like this:

How To Politely Tell People You’re Not Available Right Now

Three Steps To Let Someone Know You're Busy

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