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In life, there's a pause between the incident and the response, where you have a chance to decide how you will behave in a difficult situation.
We can call the space between stimulus and response "the Gap." It's what you do in the Gap that determines who you are and where you go.
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Gaps offer excellent opportunities to learn, especially when we don't have time to deliberate, when we're not our best, when we don't have any willpower. We may feel justified to behave in a way that the situation dictates.
At that moment, we can choose to compose ourselves. We can do what Epictetus says: "Always conduct yourself as though you are at a formal dinner."
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