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How to Receive Criticism without Becoming Cynical
Transforming criticism
Criticism, even done poorly, transforms leaders. The sting of criticism given years ago can still cling years later. Most often, criticisms humble you.
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Preventing criticism
Choose teammates carefully. Don’t give persistent critics a seat at the table.
Inviting criticism
Take criticism to a useful place by asking:
- What do you suggest?
- How can I be better?
- What do you want?
"Thank you," points criticism toward useful ends.
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Why We Give Criticism
- To help someone improve. Sometimes criticism is actual honest feedback.
- To see a change that we would like. If we regularly read a magazine or blog, for example, there mi...
Why Criticism Hurts or Angers
- The criticism is mean-spirited. If you use insulting or degrading language or put down the person in any way, they will focus on that, and not on the rest of the criticism.
- If you focus on the person instead of their actions, you will make them angry or defensive or hurt.
- They assume you’re attacking them. Some people can’t take criticism in a detached, non-personal way.
- They assume they’re right. Many people don’t like to hear that they’re wrong, whether it’s true or not.
How to Deliver Criticism Kindly
- Don’t attack attack, insult, or be mean in any way
- Talk about actions or things, not the person.
- Don’t tell the person he’s wrong.
- Don’t criticize at all. Give a positive suggestion instead.
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Stoicism
It is a school of philosophy founded in Athens around 300 B.C., and focuses on our psychological and emotional control we have on ourselves when faced with life’s different colours.
Stoicis...
Grit and Stoicism
Grit is a form of perseverance and resilience mixed together, and helps us move forward in times of adversity. Grit is essential to achieving big goals and to handle the seemingly never ending obstacles and tough terrains of life.
Combining Stoicism with Grit makes your mind invincible as you focus on the right thing no matter what happens, improving your performance and results in all aspects of life.
Count Your Grit
When an obstacle, a mental block, or a difficult situation presents itself, we need to pay attention to that moment and power through it with awareness, counting the grit as a +1 credit on your grit counter. This is a mini-success in itself.
It is easier when done slowly and steadily increasing your Grits daily.
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“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatur..."
Dale Carnegie
Handling People
- Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. People learn faster and retain knowledge more effectively when rewarded for good behavior than punished for bad behavior.
- Give honest and sincere appreciation. The only way to get a person to do anything is by giving them what they want.
- Arouse in the other person an eager want. The only way to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
Appreciation and flattery
- Flattery is selfish and insincere. It’s cheap praise. You tell the other person precisely what he thinks about himself.
- Appreciation is unselfish and sincere. It happens when we stop thinking about ourselves and begin to think of the other person’s good points.
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