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How To Make A Good First Impression
What Not To Do
- Avoid discussing politics and religion as many people have strong feelings about these topics and if your opinion differs from theirs, an unpleasant argument could ensue.
- Tasteless jokes, especially those which target a specific gender, cultural group or sensitive topic, are not funny and may create legal difficulties for you and your employer.
- Never bad mouth a current or past employer, or engage in malicious gossip about co-workers.
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Key Ideas
First impressions
In less than one-tenth of a second of seeing someone for the first time, our brain processes information about the person’s face—which leads to quick conclusions about a new acquaintance’s qualities, including trustworthiness, competency, friendliness, honesty and morality.
Know your context
It’s important to first consider where you are trying to make a good impression—whether it’s a formal job interview or a dinner date.
Context matters. It gives you cues as to how you should dress, speak, look and behave, in a way that matches the setting you are entering to. That is a key aspects of making a good impression.
Adjust your attitude
Try not to look bored, rude or hostile.
A useful attitude is welcoming, curious and enthusiastic: smile, make eye contact long enough to notice the color of that person’s eyes, sit without crossing your arms or legs. This project a positive, open warm impression.
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Key Ideas
First impressions matter
You’ve got a lot to pack into those seven seconds to make your impression a positive one.
Show confidence in your body language
When you’re nervous, it shows in the way you’re standing or what you’re doing with your hands. The same goes for when you’re confident. Standing tall and making eye contact shows confidence.
If you need a quick boost of confidence, take a power pose. One great power pose is the wonder woman – your hands on your hips, legs out in a V shape, shoulders and back straight, and chin slightly up.
Be aware of the way you speak
- Speak clearly and with an even tone. Not too loud or too quiet, as you could come across as dominating or shy.
- Using filler words such as ‘um’ or ‘so’ or filling in gaps with ‘like’ or ‘you know’ will make you seem less knowledgeable. Pay special attention to your usage of the word ‘like’.
- If you need time to compose your thoughts, simply pause, or restate the question.
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Key Ideas
Thin-Slicing
Thin-slicing is when we take a mental snapshot of someone and guess their competence, confidence and likability in less than a second.
Self-Evaluation
Choose ONE word from this list of adjectives or pick your own to fill in the blank. When people first meet me, they think I am_____
- Charismatic or boring
- Outgoing or shy
- Kind or judgmental
- Intelligent or weird
- Open or closed
- Powerful or weak
- Engaging or odd
- Professional or casual
Did you pick a positive word? Or a negative word? You have to know where you stand now to move to where you want to be.
Ideal Firsts
The most important thing to do for giving a good impression is to set your intention. Right now pick your ideal first impression word. When people first meet me, I want them to see me as_______.