Each time we worry and nothing bad happens, our mind connects worry with preventing harm:
Worry → nothing bad happens.
And the takeaway is, "It's a good thing I worried."
Try starting a phrase with “I am” followed by an adjective and repeat slowly, as a set of three. Ex: “I am at peace”. Remind yourself that nothing lasts forever by repeating "this too will pass" in rhythm with your breath. Fit the following affirmation to what you need in the moment: “I am _____, and I deserve every _____ thing .” Ex: “I am beautiful and I deserve every beauty-filled thing.” “It’s not about you .” is a mantra that helps with concerns about the opinions of others. “All is well .” If repeated several times reminds you hat things are going to be OK. Acknowledge the good things in your life during a moment of anxiety by repeating “thank you. ” Repeating “Calm down ” to yourself with deep breathing exercises may be useful. “You are lovable. ” Is useful if you are feeling stressed or panicked over a loved one. “What can I see and experience today that will thrill and amaze me? ” will refocus your mind on something positive rather than negative.
If I worry, I'll never have a bad surprise. It's safer if I worry. We believe that the act of worrying itself somehow lowers the likelihood of a dreaded outcome. I show I care by worrying. We need to distinguish between caring about a situation and worrying needlessly and fruitlessly about it. Worrying motivates me. We need to differentiate between unproductive worry and productive concern and problem solving. Worrying helps me solve problems. Extreme worry is more likely to interfere with problem-solving.
Just like the body craves calories, the mind craves control. In fact, we can fool our minds into thinking we’re actually solving a problem by running it over and over and over again in our minds. And to make things worse, like junk food, worry also happens to be constantly available, dirt cheap, and instantaneous.
Each new thing we learn is like adding a new brick to a building and then cementing it to other bricks to create a knowledge structure. When we’re collecting bad ideas, we are adding shoddy bricks on a poor foundation. Our reasoning is going to be bad and we will suffer.