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Enhance your Relationships

Enhance your Relationships
  • Give your undivided attention. Put away the cell phone, set aside your task list and quiet your internal monologue.
  • Check your personal agenda at the door. Resist the urge to chime in with your parallel experience and let their story play out.
  • Give space and allow for silence. Sometimes people need a pause to gather their thoughts.
  • Open up your language. Use open-ended questions, such as "how" or "what" to invite exploration and communicate curiosity and lack of judgment.
  • Reach out regularly to show them that you care. 

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The way to get others to see your perspective is to ask them for advice. When we ask them for advice, they put themselves in our shoes and look at the world from our point of view.

A common fear is that we may seem less competent, but when we ask for advice, as long as the request is not completely obvious, we appear more competent. Advice signals respect and deference.

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IDEAS

  1. Ignore internal and external distractions (thoughts and sounds).
  2. Listen to the content of their speech and their specific wording
  3. Listen to the context of their speech. Keep in mind the circumstances and themes and how they relate what’s being said.
  4. Listen to the tone of their voice. It conveys the speaker’s feelings.
  5. Listen for the emotions the speaker is likely experiencing so they will feel understood.
  6. Pay attention to their body language and make appropriate eye contact.
  7. Provide small verbal encouragements and don't fight silences.
  8. Ask open-ended questions to encourage elaboration and further your understanding of the big picture.
  9. If you need them to slow down or want specific info, ask close-ended questions.
  10. Offer affirmations that the person has made valuable and important choices.
  • Acknowledge the opinions, feelings and needs of others
  • Be more open to suggestions and compromises
  • Give 100% of your attention to the job
  • Spend more of your free time out with people
  • Get a grip on your emotions through regular practice
  • Work on overcoming your insecurities
  • Learn people’s emotional triggers and avoid setting them off
  • Start saying sorry more often

  • Learn to forgive

  • Encourage healthy discussions instead of fights

  • Stop sweating the small things

  • Don’t jump to conclusions

  • Make criticism constructive

  • Spend some time with your family

  • Don’t nag people, preach or give them unwanted lessons

  • Never make rash decisions or start conversations when you are feeling angry or moody