2. Know Your Priorities - Deepstash
2. Know Your Priorities

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which, for many of us, is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

However, for others, work is their priority, and helping on extra projects could mean the chance for a promotion or raise.

It’s all about knowing your long term goals and what you’ll need to say yes and no to in order to get there. 

MORE IDEAS FROM The Gentle Art of Saying No for a Less Stressful Life

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry, but…” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important when you learn to say no, apologizing just makes it sound weaker.

You need to be firm and unapologetic about guarding your time.

When you say no, realize that you have nothing to feel bad about. You have every right to ensure you have time for the things that are important to you. 

5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you.

When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it.

However, if you erect a wall or they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

The Art of Saying No (Gracefully)

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments—you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

That’s why the art of saying no can be a game changer for productivity.

Requests for your time are coming in all the time—from family members, friends, children, coworkers, etc.

To stay productive, minimize stress, and avoid wasting time, you have to learn the gentle art of saying no —an art that many people have problems with.

However, it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship.

1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments and how valuable your precious time is.

Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it.

Be honest when you tell them that: “I just can’t right now. My plate is overloaded as it is.”

They’ll sympathize as they likely have a lot going on as well, and they’ll respect your openness, honesty, and attention to self-care.

It's not you, it's me

Simply say so—you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization—but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true, as people can sense insincerity.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying NO.

Sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people.

When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

Deepstash helps you become inspired, wiser and productive, through bite-sized ideas from the best articles, books and videos out there.

RELATED IDEA

The Importance Of Prioritizing Your Needs

It’s important that we attend to our own needs before attending to the needs of others. This assertion may make you feel uncomfortable, particularly if you strive to be loving and giving in all that you do. 

But allowing your needs to remain unaddressed while you continuously cater to others is the path toward resentment and bitterness.

The people pleaser

There's a high price for continually saying yes to the thing you just don't want to do.

When your top priority is to be liked all the time, you suppress and repress who you are. The good news is that it is a habit you can change.

  • The Indirect “No."Say no without feeling uncomfortable by explaining the reasons why you can't.
  • The “Let me get back to you.”Buy yourself time to think if you could do it and come up of a way to say no.
  • The Conditional “Yes.”With this conditional yes, we force people to prioritize. It shows that you have other things on your plate.
  • The Direct “No.”When you have mastered saying no, you stop giving excuses and start to say no firmly. Practice makes perfect.