Psychologists define other-oriented perfectionism as people who direct their unrealistic perfect expectations outward, such as at their partner, co-workers, and children.
These perfectionists appear to view themselves as flawless and others as coming short. As a result, when people close to them fail, they may often respond with accusations: "If only you did that right, you would be more successful and happier." However, under this type of perfectionism lies insecurity and often narcissism.
MORE IDEAS FROM Perfectionism Can Become a Vicious Cycle in Families
Parents with other-oriented perfectionism may be frequently dissatisfied, creating a tense and controlling home life. Moreover, by holding their children to ambitious standards, they risk passing this tendency to the next generation.
Children can also develop this outlook by being raised in a highly evaluative family that regularly criticised movies, food and other family members. When these parents attempt to help someone, they will yell at or humiliate others to get them to do things their way.
Studies have found that child-oriented perfectionism can lead to dissatisfaction with parenting and a burden on the role of parents. This burden may increase to such an extent that parents may feel sorry for becoming parents.
However, parents can overcome this tendency by accepting their child as "good enough." Whenever they fail to regard their children unconditionally, they can acknowledge their mistakes, apologise, and do their best to repair the damage.
Many American parents believe that their choices carve out their children’s futures. They seek expert advice to attempt to raise the happiest, most successful, and most well-adjusted leaders of tomorrow.
Perfectionism is a personality trait, which can be an endless pursuit of high standards in every area of our lives, but can also be a 'disorder' like condition or a phobia, akin to 'Fear of Failure'.
Various studies conducted in the U.S. population indicate growing anxiety towards a possibly grim future. Political turmoil, gun violence, global plagues, changing power structure and a widening rich-poor divide make us believe in a future that is more stressful and complicated than the present.
Our children are the most vulnerable. Depression cases among the young are climbing since the 90s. Suicidal cases among 10 to 24-year-olds have risen 56 per cent from 2007 to 2017.
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