Chief Mom, wife and daugher.
Oct 15, 2020
Psychologists define other-oriented perfectionism as people who direct their unrealistic perfect expectations outward, such as at their partner, co-workers, and children.
These perfectionists appear to view themselves as flawless and others as coming short. As a result, when people close to them fail, they may often respond with accusations: "If only you did that right, you would be more successful and happier." However, under this type of perfectionism lies insecurity and often narcissism.
The most common career tips are:
Data and research suggest that it is better to ignore this kind of advice as it is often harmful, even if it feels intuitively right.
During the course of working at home, we've learned to keep ourselves intact in a system that requires us to provide instant feedback and urgent responses. We have also learned to crave the feedback of notification either auditory or visual.
Our hearts race when we hear that "ping". To lessen this feeling we must learn how to de-program ourselves from being connected all of the time. Learn how to disconnect from your devices and purposefully take some time off to cool down.
Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about people, events, and circumstances.
They are invented reasons we create to defend our behavior, to postpone taking action or simply as a means of neglecting responsibility.
Tasks that are being avoided by us hang around like a dark cloud. Soon there are many such clouds hovering around us. We could start working on a task, but as soon as we think of doing something, we get lost in the cloud.
When a deadline or any other urgency makes us finally tackle the cloud-like task, it changes shape, becomes small, solid and clean. We then realize that the cloud wasn’t the actual task, but was a foggy mess of immaterial stuff. The task is the final product, the solid object which is easier to handle.
The biggest mistake is to journal only in reaction to something that is going on, instead of letting it be part of a system.
Make writing in your personal journal part of your everyday routine.
Most groundbreaking work takes at least a full decade or more to reveal itself.
For example, one study found that of 500 famous musical pieces, nearly all of them were created after year 10 of the composer's career. Similar patterns were found with poets and painters and even in the fields of science and math. This period of hard work is also referred to as the 'ten years of silence.'
Personal development is an abstract area. It can mean different things to different people and there’s no universal strategy for measuring it.
Personal development translates into those activities that help you become a better, reliable human being.
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