Legitimate fear tends to make us want to get the heck out of whatever situation we are in.

Not-helpful fear makes us hesitate rather than bolt.We are afraid of looking stupid, and so we don’t ask a burning question. We fear failing, and so we don’t even try.

Consider that your fear isn’t legitimate

It doesn’t work to say to yourself, “I have to stop being afraid.”

<ol><li>If you notice yourself having a thought that undermines your attempts at bravery, simply label it as such: “Oh, there’s a fearful thought.” </li><li>Actively fill your mind with courageous thoughts. Think about how the last time you did it, it wasn’t that hard. Think about how you’ll regret it if you don’t do it.</li></ol>

Manipulate your thoughts

<ul>
<li>IF my team grumbles or pushes-back because I’m not working on the weekends anymore,</li>
<li>THEN I will forward them <a href="https://hbr.org/2009/10/making-time-off-predictable-and-required">Leslie Perlow’s Harvard Business Review article</a> about how ‘Predictable Time Off’ improves both work quality</li>
<li>AND quality of life, even in client-oriented businesses.</li>
</ul>
Fear is the thing that in truth makes actions hard, not the action that we think we are afraid of.

The "If X, Then Y” plan

Last week, I lead a workshop for 20 top female executives from around the world-it was a great pleasure, and a great honor. We worked on the issues that are holding them back at work, as well as the things that are keeping them from enjoying the lives they've worked so hard to create.

Manipulate your thoughts

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