Ideas from books, articles & podcasts.
Recognize that there are two issues to be addressed: both of your emotions and the situation at hand.
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Name-calling, attacking a person’s character and using someone’s beliefs or traits to call their argument into question.
For example, you can’t say that someone’s argument about dogs being better than cats is weak because they are also a Republican. It offers no real support to yo...
If they manage to throw you off with a really good point, try to stay on topic as best you can.
Going off-topic can destroy your credibility, make you look defensive, and start new arguments. Stay focused on the current subject and keep your emotions out of it.
If enough people agree to something, it sort of becomes true in a social setting. It may not be 100% factual, but with a little supporting evidence, your buddies can be a better backup than any fact out there.
It is, however, best to avoid the fallacies of bandwagoning and
The right questions can help you break their argument down logically.
Word your argument in the form of open-ended questions that force them to address your points.
Even if you’re pretending. Listen to what they have to say and take it in. Don’t shake your head while they talk, cut them off mid-sentence, or look away like you don’t care about what they’re saying.
If you appear to be giving the other side’s position a thoughtful review, then the solu...
Using a single personal experience as the foundation of your argument or your big piece of evidence.
For example, your phone may have broken right after you bought it, but you can’t use that to argue that those phones are not worth the purchase for others.
Using statements that imply “all” of something or “every” thing is a certain way.
For example, saying something like “all dogs pee on fire hydrants.” This would require you to be omniscient to make such claims, which is not possible.
Making up a scenario to make the opponent look bad. You’re assuming and making incorrect correlations.
For example, if they don’t like orange juice, they must think oranges are bad for people.
Assuming something is caused by something else just because they happen to correlate.
For example, the number of homeless people in an area might correlate to the crime rate for the same area, but crime doesn’t necessarily cause homelessness and homelessness doesn’t necessarily c...
When you have good evidence, it makes it a lot easier to counter other people’s points while supporting your own.
Prepare ahead of time. That way, when an argument comes up, you’re locked and loaded with answers to show your adversary that you know what’s what.
Ignoring certain facts because of personally held beliefs.
For example, you can’t cherry pick evidence that supports your claim and deny the evidence that doesn’t.
Winning can mean:
Winning an argument often comes down to who can go the longest without contradicting themselves and keeping sound logic, not direct persuasion of the other party.
The advantages are:
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To gain trust and build rapport, you need to hear out what the other person thinks without interrupting or disagreeing.
Try asking open-ended questions, like: "Why do you think that?"
Premise 1: I can’t explain or imagine how proposition X can be true.
Premise 2: if a certain proposition is true, then I must be able to explain or imagine how that can be.
Conclusions: proposition X is false.
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How many times have you made a claim about some piece of trivia only to realize, as soon as you’ve made that claim, that you’re completely wrong?
Stop and think before you make such errors, and you’ll be less likely to lose, whether the matter is trivia or a truly important
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