How to Win an Argument - Dos, Don'ts and Sneaky Tactics
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They are very different from a debate in front of an audience.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
In trying to change a behavior, reason will take you only so far, incentives must be taken into account as well.
In psychology, operant conditioning is a type of learning in whi...
Studies on reinforcement revealed that the best way for us to learn complex behaviors is via continuous reinforcement, in which the desired behavior is rewarded every time it’s performed. Consistency and timing are the keys.
Nonetheless, some argue that intermittent reinforcement is the most efficient way to maintain an already learnt behavior. It consists of giving reinforcement only some of the times that the desired behavior occurs.
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To gain trust and build rapport, you need to hear out what the other person thinks without interrupting or disagreeing.
Try asking open-ended questions, like: "Why do you think that...
If you mimic your opponent (in a subtle way), they are more likely to believe you.
For example, if they are sitting cross-legged, wait a few seconds and cross your legs too. And make sure that what you are doing is not too obvious.
...while you listen. This makes the speaker's arguments less persuasive, which makes your opinion look strong.
Fix the speaker in your sight as soon as they start speaking.
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“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatur..."
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Manipulators become bullies when they intimidate or harms others, and pick on people they perceive as weaker. But standing up to bullies often cause them to retreat.
When a psychological manipulator insists on violating your boundaries, and won’t take “no” for an answer, deploy consequence.
Effectively articulated, consequence gives pause to the manipulative individual, and compels her or him to shift from violation to respect.
Diplomatically but firmly. A well articulated “no” allows you to stand your ground while maintaining a workable relationship.
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When children witness a parent in a state of anxiety, they can become unsettled, because they take information about how to interpret situations from the parent.
If you notice your child sho...
A big part of treatment for children with anxiety is to teach parents stress tolerance.
A mental health professional can help you work through methods of stress management for your specific needs.
You might learn strategies in therapy that you can impart to your child when she is feeling anxious.
Try to maintain a calm, neutral demeanor in front of your child, even if you are still trying to manage your anxiety. Children are quick to read facial expressions.
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We have the tendency to give more weight in our minds to things that go wrong than to things that go right—so much so that just one negative event can hijack our minds in ways that can be detriment...
Do not do unto others what you do not want to be done unto you.
It is about focusing on eliminating the negative more than encouraging the positive. Because there’s abundant evidence from multiple sources that relationships are far more strongly affected by negative things than positive things.
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Winning an argument often comes down to who can go the longest without contradicting themselves and keeping sound logic, not direct persuasion of the other party.
Using a single personal experience as the foundation of your argument or your big piece of evidence.
For example, your phone may have broken right after you bought it, but you can’t use that to argue that those phones are not worth the purchase for others.
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“In crisis situations, emotions can dictate a person’s actions at the detriment of rational thinking.”
To use communication skills to get a person to change from a negative behavior to a more desirable one.
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Instead of viewing someone’s bad mood as a problem to be fixed, if your perspective slightly and try to see it as a puzzle.
When you shift from problem-thinking to puzzle-thinking, your mi...
Rather than putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, try to remember a time when you wore the same shoe.
Try to recall a time when you struggled in a similar way and with a similar set of difficult emotions and moods. It's a powerful way to appreciate someone else struggle.
Most people struggling emotionally don’t want someone to fix their pain, they went to feel understood.
Use Reflective listening. It means that when someone tells you something, you simply reflect back to them what they said, either literally or with your own slight spin on it.
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Accept that you have to put in place remote work systems, even if more than half of your employees ultimately revert to office-based work.
Intentionally design for the same interactions that would otherwise happen if people were in the office.
Your people need to feel your presence as a leader as they will have fewer opportunities to see you face to face when they work remotely.
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