deepstash

Beta

© Brainstash, Inc

AboutCuratorsJobsPress Kit

Workplace Drama

When workplace drama affects you, it can become an insidious cloud that permeates your day-to-day.

Be mindful and ask yourself, "What is actually going on here?" Focus on the facts and avoid what you think happened. Know that you can't control how you feel, only how you react.

@osc684

MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE

Count Your Elephants

Make a list of all of the awkward, uncomfortable realities that haven't been discussed out in the open. 

Set aside time to consciously think through, what's actually bothering you right now and write down these elephants to enable you to resolve these issues.

Be honest with yourself: Are you contributing to the situation negatively or doing anything to help?

Write down the ways in which you've contributed, and identify how you can personally take responsibility. 

Go through all the players and imagine each person individually disappearing from the organization. Does the problem go away? If it does, then this person is the key. 

If this person's performance is the issue, that's the elephant in the room that you need to address tactfully. For any other issue, your best weapon is to find empathy for this person.

You know your allies, as you've likely been venting to them. But they are red herrings that may be making things worse.

  • Venting to them reduces the symptoms without addressing the core problem.
  • By venting to them, they can allow a distorted truth when they allow you to focus on your version only instead of the full facts.

Don't give in to this distraction.

Empathy diffuses drama. Seek to understand their emotions and what they're trying to accomplish. 

Even if your opinion is unchanged, a true connection is your greatest asset to influence someone for the better.

... from most difficult to the least. If a conversation feels like it will be difficult, it means it's the most important one to stop avoiding.

Seek empathy and use as much tact as you can muster. You'll find that even if you disagree, you'll have a useful, productive conversation.

When starting a difficult conversation, lead with what you could have done better in the situation and consider sharing your personal emotions and challenges in a tactful, authentic way. 

This is a huge opportunity to create trust. It's also where most people fail, as it requires being incredibly vulnerable.

Tell the story of what you think happened, doing your best to reveal the humanity and emotions of every individual that took part.

Focus on the challenges you have been encountering and use neutral language to share your perspective. Your words will only be heard if you are incredibly tactful.

The best way to prevent drama and politics from even occurring is to share quickly and tactfully when small issues come up.

If you come from a place of honesty, identifying where you've been inauthentic or not holding up your end of the bargain, you'll maintain an open dialog. 

Deepstash helps you become inspired, wiser and productive, through bite-sized ideas from the best articles, books and videos out there.

GET THE APP:

RELATED IDEAS

When your integrity and values are at stake, do not fold. 

There are obviously occasions when a subtle or indirect appeal, rather than a direct attack will pay bigger dividends in highly-charged political situations.

7

IDEAS

Coworkers That Cause Drama

When you're second-guessing yourself before communicating with someone, you probably have reservations based on their past reactions. 

When you do need to communicate with such people, you may need to tailor your messages to the expectation of how they might react.

  1. Ignore internal and external distractions (thoughts and sounds).
  2. Listen to the content of their speech and their specific wording
  3. Listen to the context of their speech. Keep in mind the circumstances and themes and how they relate what’s being said.
  4. Listen to the tone of their voice. It conveys the speaker’s feelings.
  5. Listen for the emotions the speaker is likely experiencing so they will feel understood.
  6. Pay attention to their body language and make appropriate eye contact.
  7. Provide small verbal encouragements and don't fight silences.
  8. Ask open-ended questions to encourage elaboration and further your understanding of the big picture.
  9. If you need them to slow down or want specific info, ask close-ended questions.
  10. Offer affirmations that the person has made valuable and important choices.