Identifying the Issue - Deepstash

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Identifying the Issue

Turn the situation inward and analyze your triggers and reactions to these situations. 

  • How do you react to a difficult person in your life?
  • How does your difficult person react to your reactions?
  • If the other person is the problem, are you growing unhealthy actions and reactions in response to him or her?
  • Are you the difficult person driving others to reactive behavior?
  • How do others react to your actions and responses?

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MORE IDEAS ON THIS

Managing your reactions

It is all about breathing. Slow, deep breathing actually triggers something at the bottom of your spine called the Vegus nerve, which sends neurotransmitters to the brain that actually calm you down.

Take a moment to reflect on how you feel. Ask yourself questions about how you can res...

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The long lens

Sometimes your worst fears about another person turn out to be true. She invariably takes credit for your work. When this occurs, begin with this question:

  • Regardless of how I feel about what’s happening right now, how can I grow and learn from this experience?

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The reverse lens

Viewing the world through the lens of the person who triggered you. It doesn’t mean sacrificing your own point of view but rather widening your perspective. 

Ask yourself:

  • What is this person feeling, and in what ways does that make sense?
  • Where’s my respon...

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Leveraging self-control

Have a clear sense of self, what causes you tension and where your limits are.

  • Seek to understand the situation. Gain some clarity by asking questions while managing your own reactions.
  • Stick to the facts and acknowledge emotions. 
  • Paraphrase and ch...

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Identifying Difficult People

Identifying Difficult People

  • The Perfectionist. If you are looking for quick results, perfectionists can be a source of frustration.
  • Control freaks. When you want to do things your way, overly controlling types can be a source of irritation as well.
  • Cr...

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When Nothing Works

Take care of yourself.

By modeling well-being practices, you not only do good for your own mind and body, but you eliminate second-hand stress for all those around you. 

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Realistic optimism

Ask yourself two simple questions when you feel you’re being treated badly or unfairly.

  • What are the facts in this situation?
  • What’s the story I’m telling myself about those facts? What do I really want as an outcome?

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Mitigating These Situations

Separate the facts from your assumptions. 

Separate yourself and your reactions from the negative emotions you may be feeling in the moment. 

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CURATED FROM

CURATED BY

bro_kzz

Unapologetic reader and proud communicator. Coffee everyday.

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Avoid self-sabotaging

  • Don't let others dictate your behavior. Choose your responses to situations rather than reacting to them.
  • Don't let others dictate your attitude. You can control your attitudes, responses and actions, but little else.
  • Don't let others devalue your sense ...

Become Your Own Manager

Become Your Own Manager

As you learn how to improve emotional intelligence, you become your own inner manager. Instead of reacting to situations without understanding why you’re able to take stock of what’s driving you. Instead of being impulsive, you’re able to slow down your reactions and make strategic choices. What ...

What You Can Control

What You Can Control

You may not be able to change the external circumstances, stressful situations, or work environment. What you can do is control how you react to negative forces and stressful situations.

For example: If you get unhealthy food at your home, you can control how or when ...

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