It’s important to know that if your negative thoughts are persistent — impacting your quality of life and functioning — it could be a sign of something more serious. Consult a therapist or psychologist to get the best possible support.
When it comes to mental health conditions, having a sounding board from an unbiased outsider’s perspective can sometimes totally shift the way you think.
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... is a reminder that we are not our thoughts — we’re just the person listening to them, and as such we can distance ourselves from our thoughts.
Be sure not to identify with your thoughts or place too much weight on them. Think of yourself as the filter, deciding which thoughts to hold on to and which ones to let go.
Meditation helps you become aware of the negative ideas about yourself that you learned from experience, it allows you to rewrite the negative mental script that your brain likes to repeat.
Journaling can be great for getting stuff off your chest and to become more self-aware. Often, we are unaware of our negative thoughts and miss the chance of challenging them — but writing regularly can help with that.
You can create a two-column journal. In the first column, keep notes on any self-criticism that comes up throughout the day. Later, rewrite the first column in more empowering or positive ways to reframe it.
If you’re beating yourself up over something, picture someone that you love in your shoes and think what would you say or do to support them. This allows you to take a step back and practice a little self-compassion, it can help to keep things in perspective.
The way we talk to ourselves about the events in our lives is subject to the same laws of learning and habit formation that physical behaviors are.
That means we can learn to talk to ourselves in specific ways just like we can learn to tie our shoes or say please and thank you.
Don't fool yourself into thinking you’ve already achieved a goal, even though you haven’t, then you won’t try to achieve it, even though you should.
Consider this example. You’re overweight, you know it, and you don’t want to be. The false positive mode of self-talk would say, I’m in perfectly good shape. I don’t need to change anything. But something tugs at your mind from inside. It’s the nagging, persistent knowledge that you’re fooling yourself.
The true positive mode of self-talk : I want to lose ten pounds, and I know what I need to do to achieve it.
You start developing self-relation skills when you’re a child. It’s a life-long process that allows you to be accepting and compassionate toward yourself, feel competent to achieve your goals, take action as your authentic self, and genuinely feel all the joys and disappointments of life.
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