Bad Leaders React, But Here's What Good Leaders Do
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Reacting is when we unconsciously experience an emotional trigger and unconsciously express or relieve that emotion.
However, when we respond, we notice how we are feeling, and we consciously decide how we will respond.
Research indicates that Emotional Quotient EQ is what determines how successful you will be as a leader. Most leaders get hired because of their IQ, but promoted or fired because of their EQ.
The good EQ allows you to manage your emotions. It enables you to understand your feelings, manage them and then take time to make the right decision.
Leaders set the tone for the organization, and excessive reactions can create a stressful environment. One where people choose not to pass on information or bad news because they fear that it will be the messenger who will get shot.
When we disrupt the information flow, it creates all kinds of issues, it can lead to you not being up to date or informed about what's going on, it can mean that you miss the opportunity to address a critical situation before it becomes a catastrophe.
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Assertive communication allows us to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions without judging or blaming other people.
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The emotionally intelligent person knows how to stay calm during stressful situations.
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EQ is the ability to be able to recognize and regulate your own emotions, while also empathizing with others and maintaining an awareness of their reactions.
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Having a deep understanding of yourself provides you with more accurate perceptions of how you are coming across to others.
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While responding seems like the prudent choice, in a crisis or emergency situation it may seem that you would logically need to react or operate in a split-second decision mode.
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We tend to respond to people using the same tone they use to speak to us.
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Sharing your opinion when others are aggravated can be counterproductive. If things get emotional, and you can’t leave, you may need to stop talking and let them express their feelings.
Breathe deeply and remember that moods are temporary. And that their words at this point may be extreme or exaggerated; resist the urge to respond in kind. Often, once they let everything out, they'll calm down.
Recording is concentrated listening, with the intent to learn more about another's perspective. You're not trying to figure out how to reply; instead, you're listening to understand.
As you tune into another, don't judge or offer advice. Instead, focus on learning more about how the other person sees you, how they see themselves, and how they see the situation.
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Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.
There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.
IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ).
You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.
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EI means the mastery of emotional competencies.
That includes self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.
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Feelings are preceded by emotions and tend to be our reactions to them. Emotions are a more generalized experience across humans, but feelings are more subjective and influenced by our personal experiences and interpretations, thus they are harder to measure.
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Emotional intelligence makes it easier to anticipate and respond to others' sentiments.
Bad news from work can shock or dismay your employees, while good news may make them unreasonably optimistic. Emotional intelligence means you can tell ahead of time how others will react and develop a strategy to keep them grounded.
Those with emotional intelligence have an easier time assessing the emotional and psychological state of their employees.
This makes it easier to determine if someone is suffering from: anxiey, depression, grief, trauma or eating disorders. By recognizing these states, you can provide them with the support and professional resources they need to recover.
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Responding means not jumping to conclusions, seeing the situation from every angle and accepting that your opinion may not be the only one or even the best one.
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Before reacting, pause and allow your initial emotional reaction to pass.
Then address the opportunity again, and see how you respond differently. Repeat this process, giving yourself time to work through your old conditioning. Consider going for a drive/a walk. This will give you time to relax and settle your thoughts.
Clarity is tough when you’re under pressure, so never make an important decision when you’re feeling anxious.
If you’re not physically or emotionally up to the task, put off making a move until you’re in the right state of mind.
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