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Practicing The Subtle Art Of Detachment

Attachment and control

With attachment comes a very strong urge to control the circumstances.

You put yourself at risk by investing so much of yourself into something,  unwilling to believe that there is a tiny chance that it might not quite work out the way you plan.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

Practicing The Subtle Art Of Detachment

Practicing The Subtle Art Of Detachment

https://medium.com/personal-growth/practicing-the-subtle-art-of-detachment-b3f94b91fcf2

medium.com

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Key Ideas

Passion and attachment

Feeling too much passion and attachment towards something can skew our perception of it.

And that's risky because it can make us unwilling to see the flaws in our plan.

Simone Weil

Simone Weil

“Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be obtained only by someone who is detached. ”

Detachment from material goals

When you detach yourself from the compulsion of owning things just for the sake of owning them you begin to experience real freedom and joy from things that really matter.

By clearing the clutter from our lives, we can all make room for things that truly add value: health, relationships, passion, growth, and contribution.

Detachment in relationships

Most of us misunderstand love to be all about holding on to the other person, trying to fix them and taking care of them in all ways possible.

We need detachment to not take personally other people's reactions, to not seek outside validation and to draw boundaries so that others don’t control us.

Detachment from your experiences

Life is meant to be lived and to not to be over-analyzed.

So learn to see the lessons from an experience and move further in life with new wisdom and. Don't carry the bitterness, guilt and regret over the past experiences - they will spoil your present days.

Detachment from your work

It means that you do not rely on work alone to give you a feeling of completeness and to provide meaning to your life.

Detachment from your own thoughts

Don't act upon your thoughts and feelings. They are not the ultimate truth or reality.

Detachment from thoughts allows you to see your thoughts from an outside perspective,  letting them come and go without allowing yourself to feel too much about them.

EXPLORE MORE AROUND THESE TOPICS:

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

The Relationship Between Goals And Burning Out
The Relationship Between Goals And Burning Out

Effective goal-setting underlies the fundamental aspect of your motivation and keeps stressful situations at bay.

If you don’t set goals in positive, attainable ways, you may fall i...

Reorganizing Your Goal Hierarchy

As losing resources is more likely to cause burnout than gaining resources is to mitigate it, dealing with the negative aspects is more beneficial than using positive “band-aid” fixes. You want to drive down uncertainty and inefficiency to ensure that you aren’t doing unnecessary tasks and minimize your emotional exhaustion. To do that:

  1. Create a chart and place your major goal at its top, followed by layers of very specific subgoals needed to attain the major goal.
  2. Find and fix the inefficiencies in your goal hierarchy.
  3. Determine the attainability of each goal.
Burnout Symptoms And Signs Of Exhaustion
  • Chronic fatigue
  • Insomnia
  • Impaired concentration/ forgetfulness
  • Loss of appetite
  • Anxiety
  • Increased illness
  • Physical symptoms
  • Chest pain
  • Shortness of breath
  • Dizziness
  • Gastrointestinal pain
  • Depression
  • Interpersonal problems.

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Worrying about the future

Worrying is the mental habit of trying to solve a problem that either can’t be solved or isn’t really a problem. 

It gives us the illusion of control. Worrying about i...

Isolating yourself

When we hide our pain and isolate ourselves, we throw away the most powerful antidepressant: loving support from people who care about us.

You don’t need coping strategies when you’re sad discouraged, or helpless. You need people. You need support. You need someone to give you a hug and listen carefully to your story.

Keeping quiet

Most of us hesitate to push back and stand up for ourselves because we’re afraid of being perceived as aggressive or rude. And so we default to being passive.

But there’s a middle road between being passive and aggressive: You can be assertive. It means standing up for your own wants, needs, and values, in an honest and respectful way.

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What a Fixed Mindset is

It's a mentality that seeks validation. The individual builds a certain degree of knowledge and skills due to various reasons. Then, instead of consistently improving them, the person begins to see...

Disadvantages of a Fixed Mindset
  • It provokes dissatisfaction and disappointment.
  • It decreases self-knowledge and self-awareness. 
  • It cuts off opportunities. A fixed mindset person is usually afraid to take risks.
  • It encourages mediocrity.
  • It attracts mediocre relationships that will hardly bring long-term satisfaction.
  • It leads to stagnation.
What a Growth Mindset is

The growth-oriented person perceives failures as useful feedback. He doesn’t stop to wonder if he’s appreciated by others or if he should do more to impress. The growth-oriented person seeks excellence through practice. 

This involves consistency and persistence. When failing, he doesn’t get discouraged but rather motivated to succeed the next time.

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