Forgive Them - Deepstash
Forgive Them

Forgive Them

In close relationships, people are bound to occasionally say thoughtless things, or neglect you somehow. But unless it has seriously upset you, forgive them right away.

Not harboring grievances is a key way we protect our relationships from internal threats. Couples that stay in love forgive each other for minor grievances.

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MORE IDEAS FROM THEARTICLE

Couples naturally become more complacent in pleasing each other as the relationship progresses.

Notice what you do that your partner seems to really respond to. Love is subjective, we show and receive it differently, so you need to know how to love them in their language and not neglect that. 

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Solutions To Basic Communication Mistakes
  • Criticism: complain without blame.
  • Content: regularly express appreciation, gratitude, affection, and respect for your partner.
  • Defensiveness: accept responsibility, even if only for part of the conflict.
  • Stonewalling: stop any conflict discussion and call a timeout.

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Flirt With Them

Never stop romancing them. This’ll let them know for sure you’re still crazy about them.

Also still kiss them hello and goodbye. Small gestures like this help us all to experience love from our partners.

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Couples Who Stayed Together
  • When disconnected, they ache for reconciliation. 
  • avoid blaming each other in arguments or disputes, 
  • try to meet one another’s needs 
  • parent each other a little
  • understand that the future and relationships are uncertain.

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Potential External Threats

Be proactive about warding off threats to your relationship. Avoid lots of time apart, or unwise behavior such as hanging out with people you used to be on/off with.

You can’t guarantee fidelity, but you can do your best to make the relationship the container that you each value so highly, that going elsewhere isn’t desirable.

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Listen To And Value Them

When you listen, even on seemingly insignificant discussions, you understand your partner better and it shows you continue to give them the same attention you gave them in the beginning. 

Unless you are together all the time, never stop asking them how their day went. Nobody else cares enough to ask them consistently.

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RELATED IDEAS

Rekindling the Fire

Many couples have reached a cozy state of companionship. The humdrumness of life affects the long-term relationship.

It is not uncommon to lose the 'fire' and is unrealistic to expect consistency.

Though love, sex, and intimacy do fluctuate over our lifetimes, there are several possible ways to reconnect with your partner and rekindle the relationship.

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We all cause harm to our partner and the intimacy between us. We make mistakes that are foolish and unintentional and sometimes launch attacks on purpose.

When you wound another, apologize. Don't ignore the mistakes. When you inflict wounds, they can accumulate. Unacknowledged wounds can build a wall between you.

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The 5 Love Languages

The 5 Love Languages is the concept, from Dr. Gary Chapman, that there are five different ways of communicating love.

The 5 Love Languages are:

  • Words of Affirmation
  • Quality Time
  • Receiving Gifts
  • Acts of Service
  • Physical Touch

People express love differently, and they have different ways they want to receive love. So, some of these languages may speak more to us than others.

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