If you answered 'Yes' to even a few of these questions, you are probably in a codependent relationship.
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Codependency essentially happens when one person is sacrificing more for their relationship than the other.
In a healthy relationship it's normal to depend on your partner for comfort and support. But there's a balance between each partner's ability to be independent and their ability to enjoy mutual help.
The first sign of codependency will involve one person starting to take on the responsibility to keep in touch and connect while the other partner pulls back in how much time, effort, and care they are giving.
As soon as this happens, the relationship has shifted in an unhealthy direction towards codependency.
Codependent personalities tend to thrive on helping others (or even thinking they may 'fix' them). When caring for another person stops you from having your own needs met or if your self-worth is dependent on being needed, you may be heading down the codependent path.
Boundaries are useful with people you care about, but in a codependent person's heart, 'boundaries' is a very negative word.
They think 'the moment I care about you, I drop all my boundaries'. In other words, you give more credence to their story than to yours.
It's important to bond with your partner but to also maintain your own life. You don't want to become so dependent on someone else that you lose who you are, or that essence that makes you unique.
Schedule date nights but also nights with friends or nights alone to unwind.
When you start losing contact with those who are important to you, it is a sign something is not quite right.
You need to be really mindful of that because otherwise, you become increasingly codependent on your partner and so when if you decide they aren't good for you, you look around and there are no friends and no hobbies.
An early sign of a codependent relationship may be the need to get approval or permission to do basic everyday living, or if you feel you can't make a simple decision without that person.
One early sign of a codependent relationship is when one person repeatedly engages in an unhealthy behavior, such as consistently drinking until they pass out or binge eating until they feel sick, and the other person either joins them in it, even though he or she does not actually like to drink or binge eat or encourages it for their own reasons.
The tail-end consequences of an action or event (those with low-probability, high-impact) are all that matter.
In investing, the average consequences of risk make up most of the daily news headlines. But the tail-end consequences of risk (for example, pandemics and depressions) are what make the pages of history books.