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Compatibility and Chemistry in Relationships

Understand what you want

The first question you should ask yourself is what type of person do you want?
  • What makes a person compatible to you? 
  • What personality traits have chemistry with you?

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Compatibility and Chemistry in Relationships

Compatibility and Chemistry in Relationships

https://markmanson.net/compatibility-and-chemistry

markmanson.net

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Key Ideas

Compatibility vs Chemistry

Compatibility is a natural alignment of lifestyle choices and moral values between two people.
Chemistry portrays the emotional bond present when you’re with someone and usually come from opposite yet complementary qualities in people.

What creates strong chemistry

Chemistry is made up of subtle behaviors and dispositions that are felt by both parties equally.

It could be the way someone laughs at your jokes or the way they talk to you or help you. The absence of chemistry is normally displayed in the lack of emotional intensity.

Compatibility between people

High compatibility between people comes from the similarities in their lifestyles and values. 
Educated people usually date other educated people. Religious people usually date other religious people. People that are not compatible normally repel one another.

Healthy and Toxic Combinations

Chemistry and compatibility do not necessarily appear together. 

  • A relationship with high compatibility but a little chemistry may be boring but convenient.
  • A relationship with chemistry but without compatibility usually leads to disaster. This relationship ignores logic - it’s the person who you know is bad for you but you just can’t stop seeing.
  • The sweet spot is a relationship with both compatibility and chemistry. 

Understand what you want

The first question you should ask yourself is what type of person do you want?
  • What makes a person compatible to you? 
  • What personality traits have chemistry with you?

EXPLORE MORE AROUND THESE TOPICS:

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Chemistry vs. compatibility
  • Compatibility refers to the similarities between lifestyles and values that form the relationship without too much forcing or compromising on anyone’s part.
  • Chemistry
Judging people

Don't judge someone by the information they put in an online profile. They may look like a perfect fit, but lack the chemistry when you finally meet in person.

Similarly, it can be easy to write someone off because your ideals don't match on paper. Who's to know if you won't have chemistry in real life?

Online dating apps

Lots of dating apps and websites claim to be able to use data to sort through profiles for better matches. But scientists and journalists can't investigate their claims, as the algorithms are the i...

Predicting romantic desire

The things that are needed to be able to predict romantic desire.

  • Actor desire. How choosy people are.
  • Partner desire or average attractiveness.
  • Compatibility: Researchers measured compatibility by subtracting choosiness and attractiveness from dater's scores of romantic interest.
Compatibility prediction

To account for research failure, it is believed that when two people actually meet, they form a shared dynamic that is more than the sum of its parts. Their individual preferences do not make up the substance of what they would find attractive.

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Network Effects

Network effects are the unseen forces that are guiding our destiny and exerting a powerful intervention on our lives, creating energy that escorts us down a path that is not always fully our intent...

Zipf's Law

Zipf's law is a mathematical probability that states that in a given set, the most frequently used data value (or word) is used twice as often as the next most common value. This is true in various statistical sets like income distribution in companies, internet traffic, phone calls received, and language.

One of the implications of this law is there are unconscious network forces and mathematical patterns governing our lives, with human beings just being nodes exchanging information.

Dinner Party Mathematics

When six to eight people are conversing at a dinner party, it is easy to focus on one conversation, but if the number is higher (say 15), then two-way conversations are more likely.

When groups get larger, the change is exponential, not linear, affecting one's social experience.

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