You Can’t Control Everything - Deepstash
The Imposter Cure

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Strategies for building self-confidence

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The Imposter Cure

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You Can’t Control Everything

When you see yourself as completely responsible for making everything go well, you take responsibility for anything that goes wrong.

Don't forget about the other people involved and their shared responsibility. And no matter how hard you try, there’s no route through life that is pain-free and in trying to prevent anything ever going wrong you’re causing yourself much greater stress. Things do sometimes go wrong, but you will get over it and see that often the outcome is even better.

2.06K

7.04K reads

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The Psychology of Feeling Like a Fraud

The Psychology of Feeling Like a Fraud

Family environment, family dynamics, and the way our parents raised us combine with our personality and our experience of the world to shape our belief system and give us a sense of who we are as a person. This means that what you learned as a child influences how you see and experience t...

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9.03K reads

Thoughts Aren’t Facts

You may feel like an imposter, but that doesn’t mean you are one. Your thoughts and feelings are useful, but they only form part of the picture, especially when it comes to anything imposter syndrome-related.

When you hear the voice, remind yourself that the imposter's ...

2.14K

7.78K reads

Overworking and Avoidance

  • Overworking. The feeling that you are a fraud inspires greater effort and conscientiousness because you imagine that everyone else is more capable and intelligent than you.
  • Avoidance. When you aspire to such high standards and have an overwhelming ...

2.07K

8.46K reads

Imposter Syndrome Is An Example Of Confirmation Bias

You decided a long time ago that you were a fraud and for years you’ve been building an argument in support of this in your head, ignoring any information that doesn’t fit and operating a strong bias against yourself. This unwavering belief is one of the biggest reasons you’re un...

2.11K

9.18K reads

How We Downplay Our Success

How We Downplay Our Success

A few examples:

  • "I got lucky or it was a fluke"
  • "I’m a good actor, I fooled them"
  • "It’s because they like me, they’re being polite, or it’s a social courtesy"
  • "It sounds more impressive than it is"
  • "I had a l...

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8.03K reads

What Triggers The Imposter Syndrome

  • Imposter syndrome can be triggered by any achievement or approval-related task or as a result of feeling insecure about your knowledge or skills, particularly when you work in a competitive atmosphere and when responsibilities increase.
  • It tends to be more in...

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16K reads

The Competence Types

These are the internal rules that people with imposter syndrome generally follow:

  1. Perfectionists set excessively high standards for themselves and believe they should deliver always a perfect performance.
  2. Natural Geniuses strive to master any n...

2.45K

13.8K reads

Setting Unrealistic High Standards

Setting Unrealistic High Standards

Imposter syndrome normally occurs when there is a tension between two views: the standards you set yourself and how you assess yourself as doing.

The high standards you set yourself are a large part of the problem, as is the negative internal voice you use to motivate ...

2.14K

13.9K reads

Compassion: The Antidote to Self-Criticism

Compassion: The Antidote to Self-Criticism

Having compassion for yourself is really no different from having it for others. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes and it’s OK to feel stressed or sad. Pain and suffering are part of our shared human experience; they are just a reaction to what’s going on in our life.

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7.34K reads

Externalize the Imposter Voice

Externalize the Imposter Voice

You need to see that this is not your voice, but the voice of your fears.

The better you get at spotting the imposter voice in action, the more successfully the strategies will work

2K

8.76K reads

How Confident People Approach Discomfort

Confident people do feel this discomfort and do experience some of the same fears. But they come to a different conclusion and this allows them to override their feelings.

Instead of interpreting their discomfort as meaning that they are imposters, they see it as a ...

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11.1K reads

The Imposter Phenomenon

The Imposter Phenomenon

  • Imposter syndrome was first described by two clinical psychologists in 1978
  • They coined the term ‘imposter phenomenon’, a condition in which people believe they are not worthy of success and have a persistent belief in their lack o...

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21.1K reads

Imposter Syndrome Is All About Fear

Imposter Syndrome Is All About Fear

Imposters fear being found out or not being good enough so strongly that they do not question their fear. If what you believe is true, then you’re right to be scared: being found out, failing, the humiliation that comes with what you imagine – these are terrifying. 

2.03K

11.6K reads

Talk to Other People

Talk to Other People

To really believe that how you feel is no different from the way other people feel you have to start talking more openly about what’s going on.

This is the only way for you to be sure that when others look confident and capable they may not feel that way all the time.

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7.22K reads

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