The FOUR Horsemen - Deepstash
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The FOUR Horsemen

  • defensiveness
  • stonewalling
  • criticism
  • contempt

Contempt is closely related to disgust, and what disgust and contempt are about is completely rejecting and excluding from the community.

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1.13K reads

MORE IDEAS ON THIS

THIN-SLICING

"Thin-slicing refers to the ability of our unconscious to find patterns in situations and behavior based on very narrow slices of experience."

  • but thin-slicing has to be done in context

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1.11K reads

Something to Remember

  • All of us gravitate towards things that mean something to us, for most of us, that's people. But if people don't anchor meaning for you, then you seek something that does."
  • Our mind, faced with life-threatening situations, drastically limits the range and amount of information that w...

110

812 reads

Human Storytelling

We have, as human beings, a storytelling problem. We're a bit too quick to come up with explanations for things we don't really have ab explanation for.

105

886 reads

Women and Men

WOMEN ARE MORE CRITICAL AND MEN ARE MORE LIKELY TO STONEWALL.

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1.06K reads

... there can be value in a blink of an eye

BLINK

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1.02K reads

"AERON" office chair

"What once was ugly has become beautiful.

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803 reads

Reminder

Our unconscious is a powerful force, but it is fallible...it can be thrown off, distracted, and disabled.

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BIG FIVE THEORY

  1. Extraversion
  2. Agreeableness
  3. Emotional Stability
  4. Conscientiousness
  5. Openness to experience

*for more detailed information about this, go to page 34 of the book BLINK

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The last idea

... the only true way to listen is with your ears and your heart.

110

938 reads

TIME and QUALITY

We live in a world that assumes that the quality of a decision is directly related to the time and effort that went into making it.

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1.91K reads

Notes:

  • ... just because something is outside of awareness doesn't mean it's outside of our control...
  • ... truly successful decision-making relies on the balance between deliberate and instinctive thinking.
  • ... in a good decision-making frugality matters.
  • for the m...

109

796 reads

The 2nd task of BLINK

So, when should we trust our instinct, and when should we be wary of them?

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1.45K reads

The power of KNOWING

The power of knowing, in that first two seconds, is not a gift given magically to a fortunate few. It is an ability that we can all cultivate for ourselves.

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The 1st task of BLINK

... decisions made very quickly can very bit as good as decisions made cautiously and deliberately.

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Implicit Association Test

The IAT was devised by Anthony G. Greenwald, Mahzarian Banaji, and Brian Nosek, and it is based on a seemingly obvious but nonetheless quite profound observation.

99

839 reads

ADAPTIVE UNCONSCIOUSNESS

This new notion of adaptive unconsciousness is thought of instead, as a kind of giant computer that quickly and quietly processes a lot of the data we need in order to keep functioning as human beings.

The power of adaptive unconsciousness, high-level sophisticated thinking to the u...

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SNAP

  • Our snap judgments and first impressions can be educated and controlled.
  • Our snap judgments can be made in a snap because they are frugal, and id we want to protect our snap judgments, we have to take steps to protect that frugality.

106

1.34K reads

Product

The product is the package and the product combined.

102

747 reads

Know without Knowing

We need to respect the fact that it is possible to know without knowing why we know and accept that - sometimes - we're better off that way.

108

956 reads

Notes:

We learn by example and by  direct experience because there are real limits to the adequacy of verbal instructions.

107

891 reads

CURATED FROM

CURATED BY

kayespina

Jus your average college student who likes to read

This book is very complex for me. It is different. I highly recommend for you to read the whole book. There are so much stories and information served into bits for easier comprehension. You never know what you'll learn from BLINK.

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2. Nurturing Fondness and Admiration

2. Nurturing Fondness and Admiration

  • Means expressing appreciation, acknowledgment, pride, care, admiration, and adoration.
  • Mutual affection and respect are essential for a lasting and fulfilling romance.

Fondness and admiration prevents

  • Criticism
  • Contempt

Relationship Apocalypse

The Four Horsemen of The Relationship Apocalypse:

  • Criticism: is staging the problem in a relationship as a character flaw in a partner.
  • Defensiveness: responding to relationship issues by counterattacking or whining.
  • Contempt: acting like you’re a b...

Get curious about how you act

... when you’re in a relationship. Think about those four horsemen of the relationships apocalypse: criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling and how often do you exhibit any of them.

Try to observe your actions and strive to understand the reasons behin...

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