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Carlos B.
@carlos_tb483
Relationship Apocalypse
The Four Horsemen of The Relationship Apocalypse:
- Criticism: is staging the problem in a relationship as a character flaw in a partner.
- Defensiveness: responding to relationship issues by counterattacking or whining.
- Contempt: acting like you’re a better person than they are.
- Stonewalling: shutting down or tuning out.
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Rhett M.
@rhettm40
The signs of unhealthy power dynamics in a relationship-and how to even them out
A “power imbalance” in a relationship
Power in relationships is the ability of each person in the relationship to influence each other and direct the relationship.
Being in control makes people feel good and may place the ...
Negative relationship dynamics
- The demand-withdrawal dynamic. One partner seeks change, discussion and a resolution to issues within the relationship, while the other partner is withdrawn, and tries to avoid the issues.
- The distancer-pursuer dynamic. One person tries to achieve a certain degree of intimacy with their partner, while the other considers this affection to be "smothering."
- The fear-shame dynamic. The fear and insecurity of one partner would bring out the shame and avoidance in the other.
Positive power struggle
Not all power struggles are destructive. Some types of power struggles allow growth within the relationship and encourage a deeper understanding and respect for each other.
While it is still a struggle, by the end of it, you have reached an understanding about which lines can be crossed, which not, and how much each partner is able to compromise.
Emiliano L.
@emil32
How to Have a Better Relationship - Well Guides
Commitment, Love, and Romance
Good relationships take commitment and effort.
The challenge for couples is cultivating a mature and trusting love that is the key to a lasting relationship.
Finding Your Love Style
- Romantic love: Based on passion and sexual attraction
- Best friends: Fondness and deep affection
- Logical: Practical feelings based on shared values, financial goals, religion etc.
- Playful: Elicit feelings by flirtation or feeling challenged
- Possessive: Jealousy and obsession
- Unselfish: Nurturing, kindness, and sacrifice
In our most committed relationship, we feel a combination of two or three different forms of love. Understanding what forms of love your partner appreciates can help your relationship.
Reignite Romance
Romantic and passionate love can fade over time and mature into a committed love.
Couples can rekindle the sparks of early courtship simply by doing something novel together. Studies show that partners who regularly share new experiences report greater boosts in marital happiness.
Harley J.
@harleyjj93
How to Fight Well in Your Relationship - Tiny Buddha
Soft language vs. hard language
- Soft language: it uses “I” statements and focuses on the actions that took place, how they made us feel, and what we want to happen.
- Hard language: it starts wi...
Create space
It's useful to agree in advance to call a “timeout” or “press pause” before arguments begin.
It will give you the time to work through what happened. Because arguing when you are in a low emotional state is not going to help you.
What if…?
Ask yourself these questions: “What if the other person had a point? What if I wasn’t being honest with myself? What if I wasn’t taking responsibility for something?”
This will provide a new lens through which you'll see the situation. You might realize that there are things you could take responsibility for, that you were probably ignoring based on your initial triggered response.
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