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Happiness isn’t in achieving fantasies
What will bring us the satisfaction and satiation we crave is, rather, abandoning our fantasies and misconceptions of what will bring us happiness.
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They are the opposite of the real and actual here-and-now. The problem with them is that when we fail to reach the future we had pictured in our heads, we face feelings of disappointment, inadequacy, and anger.
And then we start to look for help from others on how to asses our lives (mostly...
Confirmation bias plays a big role in this process: once we make a selection, we’ll do almost anything to rationalize it.
Which is why action will always trump analysis.
The human brain is a “meaning machine,” and it will make sense out of literally anything put in front of it.
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Obsession makes us gaze in only one direction at one thing, whether a habit, a memory or a person, and washes away all other concerns - but obsession amounts to the same thing in all cases: addiction.
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We are all in competition, even if we prefer to discount it. Our achievements are only evident relative to others. You swam further, dance better, or got more Facebook Likes.
We should recognize that there is competition going on. People interview to win jobs. And the best...
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We all worry, in our own ways, about how we’re being perceived.
The fact that we’re being judged matters much more than whether those judgments seem fair or well-informed. We also don’t tend to worry about someone having an undeservedly high opinion of us, unless we can see how that might ...
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