Sing it

They pop up to do mischief, even when you're not conscious of it.

We can learn to recognize bias in ourselves and reduce the harmful impact of that part of ourselves by applying acceptance and commitment therapy. It focuses on developing psychological flexibility. When we investigate our implicit biases, we become more aware of them and can bring our actions in line with our conscious beliefs.

All forms of prejudice can be explained by what’s called authoritarian distancing - the belief that we are different from some group. Because they are different, they represent a threat we need to control.

When people adopt authoritarian distancing, they display three characteristics:

• The inability to take the perspective of other people.
• The inability to feel the pain of other people when you take their perspective.
• The inability to be emotionally open to the pain of others when you do feel it.

Make a list of all of the awkward, uncomfortable realities that haven't been discussed out in the open. 

Set aside time to consciously think through, what's actually bothering you right now and write down these elephants to enable you to resolve these issues.

Be honest with yourself: Are you contributing to the situation negatively or doing anything to help?

Write down the ways in which you've contributed, and identify how you can personally take responsibility. 

Putting yourself out there is very uncomfortable for most of us.

But try to remember that discomfort is pretty normal. It's just a feeling, nothing more. So allow yourself to feel uncomfortable and accept that the feeling doesn’t mean you should stop trying that new thing your considering.

New projects can feel overwhelming, so imagining how you will get from start to finish it hard.

But you don't have to do it all in a day. Pick one small thing that will take you closer to your goal. And focus on that.

• If I worry, I'll never have a bad surprise.
• It's safer if I worry. We believe that the act of worrying itself somehow lowers the likelihood of a dreaded outcome. 
• I show I care by worrying. We need to distinguish between caring about a situation and worrying needlessly and fruitlessly about it. 
• Worrying motivates me. We need to differentiate between unproductive worry and productive concern and problem solving.
• Worrying helps me solve problems. Extreme worry is more likely to interfere with problem-solving. 

• Calm the nervous system with guided muscle relaxation, meditation, and exercise. 
• Notice when you're worrying and any beliefs that reinforce worry.  Awareness of the process gives us more choice in how we respond.
• Embrace uncertainty. Most of the things we care about in life involve uncertainty. It takes considerable practice to begin to embrace it.
• Live in the present. Practice focusing your attention on the present in everyday activities like taking a shower, walking, or talking with a friend, as well as in more formal practices like meditation or yoga.
• When we face our fears head-on, they tend to diminish. Deliberately accept what you're afraid of: "It's possible I'll miss my flight." 

Feeling overwhelmed by trying to change a behavior often makes us charge into change, and see failure as a sign of incapacity. But this straps us into a no-win situation because you are unlikely to sustain the initial momentum to change for long.

If we really want to change, one of the first things we have to do is take all-or-nothing off the table, and purge a few other thinking errors while we’re at it.

It’s almost never possible to tackle all of a change at once. We have to start with particular, very specific and measurable actions.

Each specific action is one forkful of behavior change and a set of those actions engaged over time results in a cumulative change. And accompanying those cumulative actions, we need realistic and specific goals as they provide targets to measure ourselves against.

Re-engaging with old, abandoned work sometimes reignites creativity. Whether you are inspired to do a fresh draft of the story or using elements from it, old stories help bring new life into your work.

It is rather common to sit and stare at a blank screen for a bit before the writing flows.

Use the lull by doing something active to simplify your focus. A calm walk can help you gather your thoughts and build momentum to start writing.

Some people allow fears to keep them stuck in their situations. Fear has the ability to keep you stuck and control your mindset.

You can silence it by stating this fear out loud and becoming familiar with the worst-case scenario.

“You Don’ t need permission to chase your dreams. Go execute.”

You might not be in a position to choose your workspace, but there are quick fixes: look for a spot with natural light from a window or skylight, take a walk outside when you feel stuck, or simply explore a new location. 

A new environment can quite literally lead to new ideas.

It's when your brain knows that when you’re in a certain place, you’re taking a certain action.

Take advantage of the way different locations affect you. Our brains love habits, and if we can associate certain qualities with different places, it can help us get into a better working flow. 

The goal of ACT is not necessarily to reduce one's problematic thoughts and emotions. It is to help people effectively function while they are distressed and to promote more flexible and value-driven behaviors.
In other words, the primary goal is to promote 'valued living.'

Valued living is going about your daily life in the service of values you find important. Engaging in these actions creates a sense of meaning and purpose.

The symptoms of psychological suffering are problematic when they are linked to behaviors that draw us away from valued living.