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The only way to achieve anything is to become comfortable with rejection. Here's how | Linda Blair
We find rejection upsetting
Even though rejection is seldom life-threatening, we always find it upsetting because of our interdependence. The more we value the approval and opinion of the person who's judging us, the more upset we'll be if they reject us.
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We need to take chances
We do not like to take a chance and put in a great effort, only to be rejected. Yet, if you don't take up the opportunity for fear of rejection, you will never realise your dream.
Rejection is more the norm than the exception for authors. JK Rowling, James Joyce, George Orwell and John le Carré all suffered many rejections.
We find rejection upsetting
Even though rejection is seldom life-threatening, we always find it upsetting because of our interdependence. The more we value the approval and opinion of the person who's judging us, the more upset we'll be if they reject us.
Make rejection work for you
Instead of trying to avoid rejection, you can make rejection work for you.
Be prepared to be rejected. Do not take a rejection personally. Rejection is part of the process. Instead of focussing on yourself, try and find out what is lacking. Be determined to improve.
As long as you have a dream, keep going. The result will be that you will create something even better.
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Rejection
Rejection and failure and disappointment are a regular feature of ordinary life, no matter how successful someone may be.
Any set of circumstances in which one reaches out for so...
Keep the odds in mind
If the odds are long, that is not a reason for not trying; it is a reason not to be discouraged by failure.
For instance, sending in a resume in response to an advertised job has been studied. Approximately two percent receive a response. That is not an argument for giving up. It is a matter of the odds. Sending in a couple of hundred resumes shifts the odds in your favor.
Keep more than one iron in the fire
Having a manuscript rejected by one publishing house is less devastating if that book is being considered at the same time somewhere else.
An unsuccessful job interview does not feel so bad if another one is scheduled for tomorrow.
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Don't become sensitive to rejection
We start with this high volume of negative self-talk and criticism that takes the ...
Rejection hurts
Humans are social animals -- which makes rejection all the more emotionally painful.
Anything that keeps us out of the group in an overt way, we're going to have a hard time with. It's an important aspect of who we are.
Identifying the hardest-hit
People whose self-esteem is lower will experience rejection as more painful, and it'll take them a little longer to get over it. Those who have higher self-esteem -- but who aren't narcissists -- tend to be more resilient.
Rejection-sensitive people might think about 'How can I get myself out of this situation?' or how to avoid a situation altogether.
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Experiencing Rejection
For entrepreneurs, the word ‘Yes’ is an exception, not the rule. The small business landscape, where new startups are coming and going, it is common to hear rejection, with investors not interested...
Coping With Rejection
Sticking to your commitment and progress even in the face of rejection is a good way to cope up with rejection, even if one has to blame the other party.
Blaming is not a good option, but it serves the purpose if we absorb the lesson and continue trying.
Don’t Take it Personally
Just remember that failure in one area of life does not reflect your overall self-worth and value.
You have a lot going on. If the other person said ‘no’ to your proposal, or you got rejected in that interview, it is not the end of the world, just an obstacle that is providing you with valuable lessons.
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