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Perfectionism is killing us
Perfectionist Behavior
Perfectionist behavior is a broad personality trait prevalent in today's generation. It is defined as a hypercritical relationship with one's self.
While setting high standards for oneself can be deemed as a positive quality, but perfectionism more or less assumes that we are flawed or defective.
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Key Ideas
Perfectionism
Perfectionism is a personality trait, which can be an endless pursuit of high standards in every area of our lives, but can also be a 'disorder' like condition or a phobia, akin to '
Constant Mental Punishment
The trait of perfectionism constantly makes a person judge, compare and criticize suboptimal decisions or mistakes in any aspect of the daily routine.
A person starts having mental difficulties, striving to do everything the perfect way, but falling short eventually.
The Voice In The Head
Perfectionism is a voice in our head, constantly fed by the media and society's ideals, coaxing us into doing things in the best way, to get the desired results.
It is useful in its purpose but in extremities can have negative effects on the body and mind.
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Key Ideas
Do a weekly review to reflect on your progress
Try to identify things you avoided due to fear of failure and situations where your perfectionism wasn’t worth it or moments where you did well despite being uncertain.
You...
Get an outside perspective on your perfectionist tendencies
Talk honestly and openly to someone about your tendencies and how you’re working on getting better.
Ask them to tell you when you are being too fussy about something so you can think about it.
Interrupting the cycle of rumination
- Take note of when you’re ruminating and what triggers it until you can see your patterns and find ways to counteract them.
- Don't trust your first reaction when ruminating. Most of the time, it colors negatively your read of the situation.
- Seek a diversion to break the rumination cycle.
- Think positively: remembering your successes and times you tried new things helps you to not be avoidant of tasks you can’t do perfectly.
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Key Ideas
Not Celebrating Your Success
It's never good enough, so you get sucked so far into the details that you become frustrated.
Even when your goal is complete and results in success, you believ...
Pursuing Perfection, But Never Feeling Perfect
Even if you have a clear goal of what perfection means, obsessively pursuing it is a sign of insecurity.
And insecurity, when not addressed directly, doesn’t go away because a concrete objective has been achieved, it manifests itself into self-criticism or a new overvalued goal.
Not Allowing Yourself To Fail
Instead of forgiving and viewing mistakes as a learning opportunity, you criticize and put pressure on yourself for not predicting a less than perfect outcome. You feel inadequate, and these feelings preoccupy your mind, often to the point of losing productivity.