During the holiday season, many people are uncomfortable to spend time with their families due to a history of personal fights or disagreements.
15 % of Americans say that having a family dinner stresses them out because of the resulting arguments.
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The deep wounds and scars that run in the family make people prone to various health conditions due to stress.
Chronic conditions like headaches and strokes are diagnosed due to a family's emotional climate.
There are a few ways in which can move on from pain and stress, towards acceptance and love:
TV advertisements bombard us with happy families, with pop culture showing family dinner time as a fun and relaxed time.
In reality, this isn't always the case with everyone.
Childhood has for most people been traumatic or disappointing. A tough upbringing is not something to resent, but something that has made you stronger.
Our parents and families most likely won’t change, but we can change our feelings towards them.
We need to accept our family circumstances as they are. Our healing starts when we accept.
“Reparenting” is a process that brings in self-understanding, maturing and healing.
We have to acknowledge that our childhood traumas and unfulfilled needs were not our parents' fault as they did their best, and in most cases didn't neglect anything.
Reparenting is a way to get out the chains of the past, and understanding that our parents love us and never intentionally wanted to hurt us.
Parentification constitutes a form of "role reversal" in the family when a child is made to take on parental responsibilities.
They may have to, aside from taking care of themselves, be their parents’ confidantes, their siblings’ caretaker, the family mediator, etc. It is a form of boundary violation because the innocent childhood that one is entitled to is robbed away.
Ask yourself these questions: