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The simple secrets of setting goals and actually sticking to them
Not too hard, Not too Easy
If a goal is too hard or too easy there is a chance it won't be accomplished. The trick is to work on tasks that are on the edge of our current abilities.
Keep tasks challenging but not impossible, and you will remain invested in them for long.
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Key Ideas
Destination Goals
While we set our personal goals, we make the common mistake of setting a 'destination goal', focusing on the end result, without considering the hardships and daily challenges.
When a few hindrances and setbacks come, we are easily abandoning the set goals too.
Life Direction
Instead of sticking to dream goals it is better to set a life Direction.
How to figure out a Life Direction? Ask yourself these fundamental questions:
- What energizes me?
- What do I look forward to?
- When do I feel the happiest?
- What do I want to learn?
- What kind of places or people inspire me to strive for more?
Action Plan
Determine and plan in advance all the critical parts of your goal, and break it down in small, actionable tasks.
The small, divided tasks keep you motivated by providing a feeling of progress on a daily basis.
Constant Review
Keep assessing and reviewing your progress towards the goal, constantly checking upon yourself and providing self-feedback.
Good Strategies
Embrace strategies that make your goal more achievable.
- Specific planning helps you implement with intention and drive.
- Habit stacking: Undertaking a task repeatedly results in a habit by getting it ingrained in our brains.
- Associate goals with other tasks to form connections.
Align your Environment
Our surroundings play a key role in shaping our motivation and willpower.
We should keep in mind that we normally choose what is easy for us, instead of what is good for us. For example: If we have a stock of chilled beer lying in the fridge, we are more likely to drink it rather than having something healthy.
Not too hard, Not too Easy
If a goal is too hard or too easy there is a chance it won't be accomplished. The trick is to work on tasks that are on the edge of our current abilities.
Keep tasks challenging but not impossible, and you will remain invested in them for long.
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Key Ideas
Internal vs. external motivation
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Self-Efficacy
It means believing in your ability to perform a task and achieve goals. There are 3 ways to build self-efficacy:
- Ensure early success. When first starting out, choose activities you're certain you can do successfully.
- Watch others succeed in the activity you want to try. This is particularly effective if the person you're observing is similar to you (friends, neighbors, co-workers).
- Find a supportive voice. Personal trainers and coaches are skilled in giving appropriate encouragement, as are good friends (usually).
Fundamentally Independent Thinking (FIT)
A fundamentally independent thinker understands that nothing makes a person upset, angry, or depressed; rather, what a person thinks about the world determines how they feel.
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Key Ideas
The Fresh Start Effect
During the new year, our birthday or even the start of a school year, most of us have a feeling of a fresh start, a new beginning.
These 'fresh start' moments provide us with a temporary m...
Unrealistic and Sudden Goals
We decide to suddenly start to follow our new daily routine, incorrectly assuming that suddenly we have changed, and are now a completely different and new person.
It is unrealistic to suddenly change from today to tomorrow; it's better to change in a gradual manner.
SMART Goals are Not Smart
Most of the books dealing with goal-setting talk about S.M.A.R.T. goal framework - goals that are: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-bound.
While this is a good start, being time-bound in our new self-commitments has its drawbacks.
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Key Ideas
Goals vs. systems
Goals are good for setting a direction, but systems are best for making progress. Achieving a goal only changes your life for the moment. That’s the counterintuitive thing about improvement: We thi...
Goal setting and survivorship bias
We concentrate on the people who end up winning 🥇 —the survivors—and mistakenly assume that ambitious goals led to their success while overlooking all of the people who had the same objective but didn’t succeed.
Goals restrict your happiness
The implicit assumption behind any goal is this: “Once I reach my goal, then I’ll be happy.” The problem with a goals-first mentality is that you’re continually putting happiness off until the next milestone.
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