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The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

Emotion Overshadows Content

When an emotionally charged speech is given, the people hearing it surprisingly do not give much attention to the content. They only seem to recall the raw emotional power and do not scrutinize the message that is conveyed.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/the-dark-side-of-emotional-intelligence/282720/

theatlantic.com

4

Key Ideas

Using Emotion to Influence

Whether it is the public speeches of Martin Luther King Jr. or even Adolf Hitler, emotional intelligence is at play to persuade and influence the mass audience.

The world's most influential leaders have harnessed the power of emotions in both positive and negative sides.

Emotion Overshadows Content

When an emotionally charged speech is given, the people hearing it surprisingly do not give much attention to the content. They only seem to recall the raw emotional power and do not scrutinize the message that is conveyed.

The Dark Side of EI

People having psychopathic tendencies and self-serving purposes can use Emotional Intelligence (EI) as a weapon to manipulate others.

Example: Some office team members demean and embarrass their colleagues, using emotion to hurt their psyche.

Manipulation by Selective Emotions

A way to manipulate emotionally, used by the emotionally intelligent people, is to only show the emotions selectively, for personal gain.

Emotions are shaped according to what will influence effectively, shaping the mindsets of others as suitable to them.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Emotional Intelligence( EQ/EI)

Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.

Benefits of a higher EQ
  • Ease in forming and maintaining interpersonal relationships and in ‘fitting in’ to group situations.
  • A better understanding one's own psychological state, which can include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression.
IQ and EQ

There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.

IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ). 

You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.

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Leaderships skills related to EQ
  • Working to inspire and motivate those around;
  • Focus on collaboration between team members, which creates synergy and a better experience for employees;
  • “Walking the talk,...
Emotional Intelligence Matters
EQ is not only the ability to identify and manage your own emotions, but it’s also the ability to recognize the emotions of others.
Manage your negative emotions
When you’re able to manage and reduce your negative emotions, you’re less likely to get overwhelmed. 

If someone is upsetting you, don’t jump to conclusions. Instead, allow yourself to look at the situation in a variety of ways. Try to look at things objectively so you don’t get riled up as easily. 

Be mindful of your vocabulary

Emotionally intelligent people tend to use more specific words that can help communicate deficiencies, and then they immediately work to address them. 

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Acute Awareness

One of the defining features of emotional intelligence is the ability to comprehend the effects of your feelings.

This is crucial for making sound, objective decisions whe...

Impact Interpretation

Emotional intelligence makes it easier to anticipate and respond to others' sentiments.

Bad news from work can shock or dismay your employees, while good news may make them unreasonably optimistic. Emotional intelligence means you can tell ahead of time how others will react and develop a strategy to keep them grounded.

Mental Health Management

Those with emotional intelligence have an easier time assessing the emotional and psychological state of their employees.

This makes it easier to determine if someone is suffering from: anxiey, depression, grief, trauma or eating disorders. By recognizing these states, you can provide them with the support and professional resources they need to recover.

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Questions to Assess the Emotional Intelligence of a Candidate
Is there a time you tried to do something and failed? Is there a time you received negative feedback from your boss. How did that make you feel? Is there a conflict at work that made you feel frust...
Use assertive communication

Assertive communication allows us to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions without judging or blaming other people.

Emotionally intelligent people know how to communicate ...

Respond instead of reacting

The emotionally intelligent person knows how to stay calm during stressful situations. 

They don't make impulsive decisions and understand that in times of conflict the goal is a resolution.

Utilize active listening skills

Emotionally intelligent people make sure they understand what is being said before responding. 

They also pay attention to the nonverbal details of a conversation. This prevents misunderstandings, allows the listener to respond properly and shows respect for the person they are speaking to.

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Emotional Intelligence (EI)
Emotional Intelligence (EI)

EI means the mastery of emotional competencies. 

That includes self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.

Questions to Measure EI in interviews
  • How do you establish trust? An environment with trust promotes higher working engagement
  • If you worked for your top competitor, how would you beat yourself?  This question could show the candidate's ability to put the good of the organization ahead their own pride.
  • Can you use a belief statement to explain the value of what we offer? Ask a belief statement that gets at the heart of what an organization or team offers.
Emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence

It's the ability to accurately perceive your own and others’ emotions, to understand the signals that emotions send about relationships, and to manage your own and others’ emot...

The 5 components of EI

  1. Self-Awareness: understanding of one’s emotions.
  2. Self-Regulation: it frees us from being prisoners of our feelings.
  3. Motivation: having an intrinsic desire to achieve things.
  4. Empathy: the ability to understand emotions of other people.
  5. Social Skill:  the ability to build rapport and manage relationships.

There are 3 types of empathy
  • Emotional empathy: “You feel awful? Then I feel awful too!”
  • Cognitive empathy: “I understand that you are feeling awful. That must suck.”
  • Compassion: “You feel awful? I feel for you. How can I help?”

Compassion is what we focus on for emotional intelligence.

Connectional intelligence

The ability to drive innovation and breakthrough results by tackling the power of relationships and networks.

It recognizes that leaps in creativity and progress cannot be achieve...

Emotional Intelligence: The Assumptions
Emotional Intelligence: The Assumptions

Emotional Intelligence(EQ), or the ability to be able to identify and respond to the other person’s feelings is a soft-skill based on two flawed assumptions:

  1. It is ...
The Neuroscientific View Of Emotional Intelligence

A scientific way to define and understand emotional intelligence is to view your brain as a construction, an on-the-fly builder of thoughts, emotions, and perceptions.

The reflex-like emotional reactions are just the tip of the iceberg, and the brain is constantly shape-shifting itself and processing the sensory inputs that are received into useful predictions and actions.

Emotional Granularity: Becoming An Emotional Expert

If the brain has a large, flexible range of diverse emotions in any given situation, it’s emotional intelligence is wide-ranging and finely tailored. This ability of a flexible, emotion-rich brain is called granularity.

Real emotional intelligence means understanding that sometimes feelings and emotions cannot be distilled and expressed using a predefined slot. Emotional granularity is the coming-of-age of the decades old understanding of EQ, now evolved and unfolding its many facets.