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The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

Emotion Overshadows Content

When an emotionally charged speech is given, the people hearing it surprisingly do not give much attention to the content. They only seem to recall the raw emotional power and do not scrutinize the message that is conveyed.

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The 5 components of EI

  1. Self-Awareness: understanding of one’s emotions.
  2. Self-Regulation: it frees us from being prisoners of our feelings.
  3. Motivation: having an intrinsic desire to achieve things.
  4. Empathy: the ability to understand emotions of other people.
  5. Social Skill:  the ability to build rapport and manage relationships.

There are 3 types of empathy
  • Emotional empathy: “You feel awful? Then I feel awful too!”
  • Cognitive empathy: “I understand that you are feeling awful. That must suck.”
  • Compassion: “You feel awful? I feel for you. How can I help?”

Compassion is what we focus on for emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence

It's the ability to accurately perceive your own and others’ emotions, to understand the signals that emotions send about relationships, and to manage your own and others’ emotions.

Leaderships skills related to EQ
  • Working to inspire and motivate those around;
  • Focus on collaboration between team members, which creates synergy and a better experience for employees;
  • “Walking the talk,” or act with integrity and honesty with every team member;
  • Building trust: consistently acting with integrity and honesty;
  • Developing and supporting others, and celebrating their successes;
  • Building relationships, which communicates that each team member is valued.
Emotional Intelligence( EQ/EI)

Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.

Benefits of a higher EQ
  • Ease in forming and maintaining interpersonal relationships and in ‘fitting in’ to group situations.
  • A better understanding one's own psychological state, which can include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression.
IQ and EQ

There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.

IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ). 

You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.