Creating an appropriate level of distance
Personal distress could result from poor self-other distinction - for example, forgetting that the other person's experience, not your own, is the source of your emotional state. Feeling overwhelmed with sadness and anxiety on behalf of the other person isn't really about the other person's feelings but your own.
However, having a clear sense of self should make it easier to appreciate how you are different from other people and to mentally separate yourself from them. It helps you to share another person's emotional experience with an appropriate level of distance.
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