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How to Forgive but Not Forget | Mark Manson
We all can succumb to behaviors that are not reflective of who we really are.
Separating the action from the person is crucial to find some closure.
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Key Ideas
Our inner Demons, or inner voices, make us do irrational, stupid and selfish things, based out of fear.
We hide and distract ourselves from our inner voice, which is nothing but our fear and ...
Some of our common 'demons' are:
Our inner demons lead us to negatively judge ourselves, further leading to avoiding that judgment, and eventually starting the internal self-destruction, if the negative downward spiral is left unchecked.
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Key Ideas
When you experience regret, you neglect the celebration of all of the exciting parts of your life to focus on this one festering mistake that haunts you.
The way to overcome regret is not...
Regret can be seen as a mistake that we haven't learned the proper lesson from yet. If we learn from it, that mistake becomes helpful and makes us better.
The way to move on is to take responsibility for your mistakes. Understand what happened and integrate that experience into your understanding of who you are today.
Our narratives are the way our minds construct events to explain our feelings and experiences.
They are seldom accurate and often unhelpful, but we need them to hold our sense of self in place.
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Key Ideas
Forgiveness takes time for most. Shock and anger often come before forgiveness. Deal with the hurt feelings before moving into forgiveness.
The act of forgiving is one of realizing that holding onto the anger and resentment no longer carries the same weight on us.
One roadblock people face with forgiveness is the idea of being seen as "weak" and saying that what the offender did is excusable.
It requires more strength to forgive. Staying angry, resentful, and vengeful can have a detrimental impact on your physical and emotional health as well as your relationships.