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There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be liked by people.
Our basic social and emotional requirements include that desire. So what do we do?
- Embrace disagreement — It’s normal for people to disagree, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a good thing because we all have unique life experiences that shape our perspectives.
- Realize that other people’s opinions are not our concern. They reflect a person’s mindset. So, if we have a positive friend, they are likely to have positive thoughts and perspectives of the world. Similarly, angry people have more negative opinions and perceptions. And we cannot control what they think.
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MORE IDEAS ON THIS
Not all opinions are important, we can’t make everyone happy
We’ve been taught to value other people’s opinions more highly than our own. So we develop the habit of worrying more about how others see us than how we see ourselves. This results in a culture where people try to please others to be liked but are ultimately unfulfilled since they do not like th...
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“The pressure that women feel to be people-pleasers is very real. … Young girls are told to be quiet and pleasant, to be orientated toward others, to not speak up for what they want, and to please others. These gender-based stereotypes are continuously reinforced in ou...
DR. TEYHOU SMYTH
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For People Pleasers
We stretch ourselves too far in order to please people and ‘adjust’ in society, we miss the thin boundary we had.
We’re left wondering, “How much did I alter for society?” “What kind of progress did I create for myself?” “Am I still the same person?”
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Consequences
Our desire to be liked can keep us from doing things that are important to us because we will be preoccupied with weighing what others think and what they may say.
We won’t be able to try new things because we’ll worry about what people will think if we’re not good at them. All of this will...
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We can’t make everyone happy. It’s a straight-up fact!
We have to understand that everyone’s perspective of us, and society is unique and subjective. So, while they may be correct about something due to the narrative in their head, it may be completely incorrect for us.
Someone may be having a bad day at work or a bad week at home; these are b...
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CURATED FROM
IDEAS CURATED BY
Other curated ideas on this topic:
Be With People You Disagree With
- As a leader, we will confront all kinds of people, and have to try and surround ourselves with excellent peers who may even disagree with us.
- This provides us with new insights, ideas and experiences that broaden our mind.
- We also have to make it easy for others to point out...
1. Don't Demand The World To Be Nice
We cannot expect people to be nice to us all the time, because they aren't. Humans possess the full range of emotions, desires, and mindstates: from angry, to happy, from compassionate to sadistic.
There are as many opinions as there are people, including opinions we don't like. Resiting t...
How To Be Adaptable
- Stop whining. Learn to accept the situation, adapt to it, and move on.
- Don’t mindlessly believe that something is ‘wrong’ and must be avoided.
- Discover your coping mechanism and consider changing some aspects of it.
- Be open to change. As...
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