The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out, the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish, the other selfish. One is universally admired, the other universally condemned.

If we know we are going to be rebuked anyhow, isn't it far better to beat the other person to it and do it ourselves?

Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes them strive to justify themselves. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts their sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

If we want to make friends, let’s put ourselves out to do things for other people, thins that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness.

Let the other person save face. How? Suppose we are wrong. Suppose we are harsh, unjust, and brutal. Suppose we destroy others. What do we achieve? It is more important to be kind than to be right.

Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.

The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking. So the rare individual who unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage.

Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind: 'Become genuinely interested in other people.'

The expression one wears on one's face is far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back.

Give honest, sincere appreciation. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.” and people will cherish our words and treasure them and repeat them over a lifetime - repeat them years after you have forgotten them.

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain, but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.

Ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen? Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst.

If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own.

Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say 'You're wrong'

You can make more friends in two months by becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness.

Remember that other people may be totally wrong. But they don’t think so. Don’t condemn them. Any fool can do that. Try to understand them. Only wise, tolerant, exceptional people even try to do that.

It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.

When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals.

When we are wrong, we should admit it immediately. When we are right, we need to say so, and say it without resentment or belittlement.

Anyone who takes the time to disagree with you is interested in the same things you are. Think of them as people who really want to help you and you turn your opponents into friends.

Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

Top inspirational quotes from the book How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. This book had a major impact in my life. I was able to get my first job at 18 due to using Dale Carnegie's teachings from this book.

Updated for today’s readers, Dale Carnegie’s timeless bestseller How to Win Friends and Influence People is a classic that has improved and transformed the professional and personal and lives of millions. One of the best-known motivational guides in history, Dale Carnegie’s groundbreaking book has sold tens of millions of copies, been translated into almost every known language, and has helped countless people succeed. Originally published during the depths of the Great Depression—and equally valuable during booming economies or hard times—Carnegie’s rock-solid, time-tested advice has carried countless people up the ladder of success in their professional and personal lives. How to Win Friends and Influence People teaches you: -How to communicate effectively -How to make people like you -How to increase your ability to get things done -How to get others to see your side -How to become a more effective leader -How to successfully navigate almost any social situation -And so much more! Achieve your maximum potential with this updated version of a classic—a must-read for the 21st century.

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Dale Carnegie was an American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills.

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How to Win Friends & Influence People