How To Win Friends and Influence People

Ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen? Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst.

The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out, the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish, the other selfish. One is universally admired, the other universally condemned.

If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own.

Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

The expression one wears on one's face is far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back.

Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

Give honest, sincere appreciation. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.” and people will cherish our words and treasure them and repeat them over a lifetime - repeat them years after you have forgotten them.

If we want to make friends, let’s put ourselves out to do things for other people, thins that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness.

Let the other person save face. How? Suppose we are wrong. Suppose we are harsh, unjust, and brutal. Suppose we destroy others. What do we achieve? It is more important to be kind than to be right.

Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say 'You're wrong'

You can make more friends in two months by becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness.

Anyone who takes the time to disagree with you is interested in the same things you are. Think of them as people who really want to help you and you turn your opponents into friends.

Remember that other people may be totally wrong. But they don’t think so. Don’t condemn them. Any fool can do that. Try to understand them. Only wise, tolerant, exceptional people even try to do that.

It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.

Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes them strive to justify themselves. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts their sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

If we know we are going to be rebuked anyhow, isn't it far better to beat the other person to it and do it ourselves?

If you want others to like you, if you want to develop real friendships, if you want to help others at the same time as you help yourself, keep this principle in mind: 'Become genuinely interested in other people.'

When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals.

When we are wrong, we should admit it immediately. When we are right, we need to say so, and say it without resentment or belittlement.

The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking. So the rare individual who unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage.