Prolonged uncertainty

• Make space for other people to vent aloud. They know that they are powerless, and they have to accept the situation. Venting gives them the illusion that they are in control.
• Have a little competition with your best complaints.
• Create a house chart of complaints where your kids can let out their own.
• Avoid complaining mistakes (such as: getting carried away by anger, firing too many complaints at a time or thinking that complaining alone will save us from our problems).

Lockdown poses unique problems for couples who are isolating together.
People who are used to seeing their partner at the end of the day now are now living with the new reality of not only being full-time with their significant other but also working alongside them. This situation, together with the uncertainty of the whole pandemic crisis can create tension.

There is a polarization going on around the way that people deal with fear, with anger, with the preparations in the face of disaster. You can find:

• People that become clear organizers because order for them means making sense of the chaos of the external world and the one that is rising inside of them.
• People wanting to talk all the time with other people and have a sense of what’s going on with everyone.
• People thinking that their partner is not cautious enough.

Grief involves anger and loss of emotional control, often a state of confusion.

Anticipatory grief, for those who experience it, is sometimes even more severe and stressful. It does not lessen the burden of actual grief after the loss has been experienced, and is not a substitute for it..

Anticipatory grief is a chance of closure and personal growth which comes at the end of life. It is a chance to reconcile differences and heal the heart with forgiveness.

... requires a new mindset. Our lives are being redefined in front of our eyes, and this an opportunity to rebuild, reprioritize, reconnect, and even let go of some of the things that were holding us back long before the global crisis happened.

Many of us have lost our loved ones, jobs, human touch, safety and security, and many milestones of life. It is important to feel this misery, to experience the grief, as from this sadness and grief are what will help us accept reality, and provide us with the drive and energy to move forward. We cannot be stuck in denial any longer.

Anticipatory grief is feeling unsure of what the future holds. It is that same feeling when someone gets a grave diagnosis. 

We know there is a storm brewing, and it breaks our sense of safety on a micro and a macro level.

Understand the stages of grief and realize that the stages are not linear.

Denial: The virus won't affect us.
Anger: You're taking away my freedom.
Bargaining: So, if I social distance for two weeks, will everything will be better?
Sadness: I don't know how this will end.
Acceptance: This is happening, and I have to figure out how to move forward.

Acceptance is where power lies. We find control in acceptance. "I can..."

When you recognize your external triggers, you can figure out what changes you can make to manage them.

• If having too many Zoom meetings is draining your energy, see if you can make your meetings shorter, or assess when and where you presence is not critically needed.
• If you’re stretched too thin and have the power to do so, you can think about delegating, or ask your boss what you should prioritize and what you can complete later.

Sometimes eliminating external stressors just isn't enough. When you find yourself in a prolonged state of stress, it’s time to get the help of a professional.

Chronic stress can have a negative impact on your quality of life and can also make physical health issues worse.

When you’re the best in the world, the amount of stress it takes to gain that 1% (or less than that) improvement to maintain your top form is extraordinary.

Being the best in the world only amplifies the pressure to stay game-ready.

• In order to move forward and tackle a loss, first lean into your disappointment and anger. It may also be helpful to keep a journal as a way to come to terms with your predicament and ensure your future actions are in line with your emotional well-being.
• The next step is to create and maintaining a new routine, a critical piece in keeping yourself game-ready.

Everyone is stressed out as there are losses all around. Most of us miss life before the lockdown. It is a good idea to let those feelings come out, listen attentively to the partner, and maybe give a hug, while avoiding any ‘fix-it’ response.

Rituals are important to maintain a positive connection. A ritual can be anything that makes you and your partner regularly turn towards each other, emotionally, physically or spiritually.

Rituals of connection form the pillars of this culture, making the bond stronger by reinforcing it.

Grief can very easily lead to depression. And depression is nothing to be joking around with: it can put your health at risk in no time.

Among the symptoms that can be identified with depression there are: extreme hopelessness, insomnia, loss of appetite, suicidal thoughts, persistent feelings of worthlessness, and marked mental and physical sluggishness.

In order to better handle a difficult period of grief, one has the possibility to choose from two alternatives: see a counselor or join a support group.

While the first option provides you with professional, specialized help, the second one emphasizes the importance of sharing your experiences with people who have already experienced the same kind of pain.