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How to Change Your Perspective on Negative Situations

Different viewpoints

People who lose their jobs can either dust themselves up and move forward in their next amazing adventure, or can sulk at home and not get hired due to their negative mindset. In both cases, the situation is exactly the same, but the perspective makes all the difference.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

How to Change Your Perspective on Negative Situations

How to Change Your Perspective on Negative Situations

https://www.lifehack.org/874883/change-perspective

lifehack.org

4

Key Ideas

Fixed Vs Growth Mindset

  • A fixed or static mindset is a terrible disadvantage as life is a constant flux. Life’s challenges keep on coming and difficult situations and failure are all part of it. Being rigid will only make things worse and add unnecessary complications.
  • A growth mindset has the advantage of being adaptive and trainable, able to build the skills required to handle the obstacles and move ahead in life. A growth mindset learns from failure and makes corrections, instead of being bogged down.

Different viewpoints

People who lose their jobs can either dust themselves up and move forward in their next amazing adventure, or can sulk at home and not get hired due to their negative mindset. In both cases, the situation is exactly the same, but the perspective makes all the difference.

Focus On The Good

We cannot let our mind, which has a limited bandwidth of focus and willpower in a day, get tangled in the unimportant and trivial.

A simple hack of taking your focus away from the bad things in life and being grateful for the good things can work wonders to your mind and your life experience. Always try to find the good even in the bad. Create a happiness journal which documents your good life.

Our Problems Are Common

Our mind is tricky. We feel as if we are the only ones with so many unique problems. These are common problems in reality.

Look around and you will find that there many who are going through the same problems as you are.

You may not ease your problems by changing your perspective, but you do find something to be grateful for, and that provides drive and willpower to handle the problems.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

The egocentric bias
The egocentric bias

It is a cognitive bias that causes people to rely too much on their own point of view when they examine or remember events in their life.

This means that people tend to either underest...

Examples of the egocentric bias
  • When you are giving a public talk, you assume that your nervousness is more apparent to others than is actually the case.
  • You overestimate the amount of work that you contributed to a group project.
  • You might believe that your colleagues all share your political beliefs and social values.
  • You might remember yourself as having been the key player in a past event, despite the fact that you only played a relatively minor role in it.
What causes the egocentric bias

It occurs primarily due to the fact that we tend to naturally examine and remember events primarily through our personal point of view.

Even when we realize that we should adjust our perspective to see things through other people’s eyes, we tend to anchor this new perspective to our own, and we often fail to adjust from our original viewpoint enough to properly assess how other people feel.

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2 kinds of people
  • Those who believe they can make things happen. They are convinced that the outcome of their lives and careers is more or less in their own hands
  • Those who believe things...
When hard times strike

Those that feel they are in control over their lives also feel stress and anxiety, but they use this anxiety differently: their anxiety fuels passion instead of pity, drive in lieu of despair, and tenacity over trepidation.

Expect and prepare for change

Set aside some time regularly to create a list of important changes that you think could possibly happen. The purpose of this task is to open your mind to change and sharpen your ability to spot and respond to changes. 

Even if the events on your lists never happen, the practice of anticipating and preparing for change will give you a greater sense of command over your future.

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The most desired changes
The most desired changes

The so-called 'I can't wait!' change refers to the situation when you are excited about taking on a new job, getting married and all these big changes that you decide to undergo thr...

The necessary changes

The "I know I have to" beginnings are a bit more challenging to handle than the desired ones. This is mainly because we do the changes as we need to instead of actually wanting them.

These situations require courage, determination as well as building up a plan in steps about how to accomplish the change that needs to finally happen.

The forced change

This is the " Please don't make me do this" type of change.

Change can come both from inside and outside oneself. However, when somebody or something forces a change upon us, we tend to perceive the experience as being painful. Moreover, if we are prone to depression, it can actually put our health at risk. The best two ways to cope with this kind of situation is by either seeking professional help or starting to plan our recovery.

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Reacting and Overreacting

Not all intense responses are overreactions.

The problem arises when you start to react in a bigger way than justified.  Overreactions never make the situation better.

Types Of Overreactors
  • Internal: they overthink the things that don't go their way and are unable to put their focus onto something else.
  • External: they yell, scream, or snap back at people when something isn't exactly how they want it.
Know Your Triggers

This way, you can learn to be more in control of your reactions:

  • Identify the things that bother you the most (rejection, criticism, or even something that has nothing to do with you).
  • Think about basic contributing factors like lack of sleep, being hungry or thirsty, or being overworked.

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Knowing isn't doing
Knowing isn't doing

Learning about improvement is very easy, but actually improving is really hard.

Most any change that requires a lot of consistent mental effort is going to fail because you spend most of th...

Changing your context

Your context influences your decisions. If you make an effort to control your environment, you won't have to exert self-control.

If you don't have cookies in your house, you won't be able to eat cookies.

The 20-second rule

Make the things you want to do take 20 seconds less time to start and let the things you want to keep away from take 20 seconds longer to get going.

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Hating Ourselves
Hating Ourselves

"I hate myself" is a common self-talk. You really are your worst enemy, however painful this may feel.

Feelings of self-hatred and unworthiness are felt by a majority of people. E...

Effects of Self-Hatred

Self-hatred gives us negative thoughts, telling us we are unattractive, lack confidence, and are generally unworthy. If we listen to it, we give it power. We then create a negative shield around us and will have trouble accepting love and compassion.

The internal negative breeding will attract further negativity in our lives and relationships.

How To Stop Hating Yourself
  • Pay attention to your triggers by reflecting on your thoughts and actions, identifying your inner negative talk.
  • Question and challenge your negative thoughts, and detach from them.
  • Start saying positive affirmations to yourself to counter the negativity.
  • Reframe your negative thoughts by changing your point of view.
  • Spend time with positive people who fill you with joy.
  • Seek professional help as this may be a mental health issue.
Narrative Habits

The way we talk to ourselves about the events in our lives is subject to the same laws of learning and habit formation that physical behaviors are.

That means we can learn to talk to o...

Events + Thoughts = Emotions

Our emotions are always mediated by some form of thinking. 

If our thoughts determine how we feel, that means how we habitually think will determine how we habitually feel.

Mind Reading

It happens when we assume we understand what other people are thinking without any real evidence.

It is a failure of imagination because we often only imagine and focus on the negative aspects.

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Know How To Perceive Negative Emotions
Know How To Perceive Negative Emotions

Severe chronic worriers are less accepting of their emotions, meaning they're intolerant of uncertainty and negative emotions.

Meanwhile, non-worriers tend to look a...

Ask The Right Questions.
Worriers can decrease anxiety by asking themselves the following:
  • Is it my problem?
  • Do I have any control over it?
  • Have I already done everything about it that I can? And is it imminent?
See Positive Outcomes

A worrier would likely only think of the worst-case scenario, while a non-worrier would have the capacity to think that there could be a positive outcome to a negative event.

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Marcus Tullius Cicero
“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues but the parent of all others.”
Marcus Tullius Cicero
What gratitude changes

Gratitude is intended to change three things: your past, your present, your future. 

If you’re not transforming your past, present, and future, then you aren’t fully experiencing the benefits of gratitude.

Live in the gain

Stop focusing on what's missing from your life. And rather than measuring yourself against your ideals, measure yourself against where you were before.

When you live in the gain, all you see is progress. What you focus on expands.

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How to know if you're depressed

Depression symptoms can vary, but it always results in living in a negative state. 

Common signs include:
  • Feeling hopeless or a lack of energy and interest in things that ...
Ways to deal with depression

Understand the common triggers. Once you understand which one is behind your depression, you can better learn how to cope with depression.

Feelings of loss, “less than” and “never going to happen” are the major reasons that most people dip into depression. Loss can result from a loved one dying or losing a job; feelings of “less than” can be triggered by comparing yourself to others you view as having more than you and “never” occurs when you start believing that your goals and dreams are completely out of reach. 

Address your limiting beliefs

Many of those trying to find ways to deal with depression have formed limiting beliefs that negatively affect how they think.

If you come from a family who has never had a member attend college, you might believe that you are not smart enough to achieve your goals. Another common limiting belief is that they are supposed to be sad because depression or anxiety runs in their family. 

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