Understanding How We Relate To Others
The Attachment theory claims we have different ways of behaving with regards to commitment and intimacy, and this is related largely to our upbringing and life experiences.
One can know the various attachment styles and see where they fit into, having a better understanding of their reactions towards others.
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If one’s goal is to please everyone, the road then leads directly to failure and disappointment. Even if we are absolutely right, it is a subjective figure in the eyes of others, due to everyone having a different set of values.
Other people, including friends, family and strangers have diverse ideas about what is right or wrong, and nobody can perfectly align with others. The fear of disappointing others can be a powerful negative emotion, that can be a cause of worry for our mental health.
Our comfort zone stands in the way of our growth and learning. The only way to conquer fear is to push yourself into uncomfortable situations.
Even small tasks that make you uncomfortable gets the momentum going towards bigger challenges.
Our fear of disappointing others could just be something created because of our childhood, past relationships or some traumatic experience in our lives.
How we react tells us about who we are.
We fear others' reactions as if others are going to be disappointed by us on a personal level. The disappointment need not be taken personally as the other person may be upset at the situation or towards the outside world, and how their plan did not work out.
Do not over-analyse the situation, and base your actions on your core values.
We may want to make people happy but that does not mean we let them mistake our kindness for weakness.
People can take advantage of a person always wanting to please others. Learn to say No and take control of your lives.
Some people will pursue multiple relationships simultaneously because of a fear of abandonment.
They want to have a backup relationship in case something goes wrong, but in doing so, they are putting their relationship at risk, living a lie, and not dealing with their fear of abandonment in a healthy way.
Maintain daily and weekly family routines. Eat, go to sleep, and do regular family activities according to a predictable schedule. Routines and rituals help establish a family identify, reduce stress, and create a stable, comfortable environment.
The fear of failure, which is sometimes referred to asatychiphobia, is an irrational and persisting fear of failing.
The fear of failure may also be related to being a perfectionist Because perfectionists have such high expectations for how they expect things to turn out, they may experience a nagging fear that they won't live up to those often unrealistically high standards.
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