Being Aware of The Narrative Fallacy - Deepstash

deepstash

Beta

Get an account to save ideas & make your own & organize them how you wish.

deepstash

Beta

Steps to Becoming Insanely Successful...or Whatever | Mark Manson

Being Aware of The Narrative Fallacy

The Narrative Fallacy makes us to see events as stories, with logical chains of cause and effect. When it comes to success, do not fall for the ‘narrative’ fallacy’ and think that great people became successful due to what happened to them, and if we emulate that, we will achieve the same result.

We need to do something extraordinary and exceptional to achieve great success, and that makes any successful person an exception, someone who did what few others were willing to do. Instead of googling for success, find what you want to do to change the world!

463 SAVES


This is a professional note extracted from an online article.

Read more efficiently

Save what inspires you

Remember anything

IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

Steps to Becoming Insanely Successful...or Whatever | Mark Manson

Steps to Becoming Insanely Successful...or Whatever | Mark Manson

https://markmanson.net/how-to-be-insanely-successful

markmanson.net

6

Key Ideas

Being Insanely Successful By Going Against The Norm

  • Success means different things to different people and is not always about bigger cars or the number of followers.
  • To achieve something extraordinary, you have to do something that no other people (or maybe just a few) are doing or willing to do.
  • Therefore, step-by-step systems on "how to be successful" are not going to help you achieve spectacular success.

Being Aware of The Narrative Fallacy

The Narrative Fallacy makes us to see events as stories, with logical chains of cause and effect. When it comes to success, do not fall for the ‘narrative’ fallacy’ and think that great people became successful due to what happened to them, and if we emulate that, we will achieve the same result.

We need to do something extraordinary and exceptional to achieve great success, and that makes any successful person an exception, someone who did what few others were willing to do. Instead of googling for success, find what you want to do to change the world!

Success Is Something We Make Up

  • Very few of us went through childhood without getting any emotional scars.
  • Be it home or school, we suffered many problems when our impressionable mind wasn’t mature enough to handle them the way we can as an adult.
  • Our worldview becomes skewed, and we start to build upon the mutated version of the world around us, messing up with our lives.
  • Success by itself is not about money or fame or power, but our upbringing programs us to think about success in a certain way.

Success And Existential Distress

Our definitions of success are made up and largely motivated by our emotional dysfunctions. Most people work towards the formula of success, striving for money, prestige and power, running towards a goal that keeps getting farther away. They get super exhausted and may experience a breakdown when they realize that all this does not really mean anything.

When we realize that our emotional dysfunctions and pressures of society were our main motivators towards whatever we had been pursuing, we suddenly see the futility of it all and experience an existential crisisn(or a mid-life crisis) sometime in our 40s or 50s.

You Are Gonna Be Okay

Being a good person, taking care of your loved ones, being trustworthy, positive and honest, don’t require much and makes even a simple existence an enjoyable one.

Life, as imperfect and unfair it may seem, is pretty good. Life has plenty of beautiful moments if our definition of success isn’t about accumulation of wealth or a drive towards more power, but to live a healthy, happy and fulfilling life.

Great Success Happens By Doing The Right Thing Now

Having ‘breakout’ success is not an intentional goal.

Giving your life meaning and purpose, while being creatively engaged with the problems of the now, is an emotionally healthy definition of success.

Most scientific breakthroughs have been from people who questioned the status quo and assumptions which were the norm. The ‘outsiders’ with no fixed plan asked the right questions and did something that seemed small and unexpected, in the present moment.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

If you see something as a sacrifice, it will bring you frustration

When you think you have to sacrifice something in your life in order to be successful you will build frustration and resentment towards yourself. And so that lofty goal that should ha...

This idea of sacrificing things to become successful comes from comparisons

From comparing our lives to others. Why do you think you look at things as a sacrifice? Compared to what?Well, so and so is having an avocado salad at a rooftop bar in SoHo.” Who gives a shit. ⚠️

Doing what you love is complicated

As kids, playing was described as fun while work was pretty much defined as not-fun. In school, it was implied that work was monotonous because it was in preparation for grownup work. Grownups a...

Bounds

Keep in mind this question: How much are you supposed to enjoy what you do? If you underestimate your answer, you'll tend to stop searching too early.

Liking your work does not mean doing what makes you happiest in this second, but what will make you most satisfied over a more extended period, like a week or a month. Your work should be your favorite thing to do. It should be something you admire.

What you should not do
  • Don't worry about the opinion of anyone beyond your friends.
  • Don't worry about prestige. Prestige is the opinion of the rest of the world. If you do anything well enough, you'll make it prestigious.
  • Don't be led astray by money, especially when money is combined with prestige.

A test of whether you love what you do is if you would do it even if you weren't paid for it. (Even if you had to work at another job to make a living.)

3 more ideas

The Definition Of Success
The Definition Of Success

If a person achieves what he set out to do, and is able to reach the goal they set for themselves, they are considered to be successful.

There are three positive traits tha...

Perseverance In Doing The Right Thing

If we keep out a million distractions surrounding us and think about our goal day and night, we will succeed in our goal, no matter what. The key here is continued focus, and also making the right thing as our goal.

If the aim is only money, it may not help us much, but if we keep our aim towards learning or striving to become better at something, we achieve success in monetary terms as a bonus.

Emotional Intelligence and Success

Emotional Intelligence, the ability to understand yourself and the people that you live and work with, is an excellent trait to balance and correct yourself.

Everything and everyone is connected to one another forming a huge ecosystem. Our endeavours, whether to get a job, to lose weight or to find a life partner is always related to others.

one more idea

Michelangelo

“The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim ..."

Michelangelo
Find What You Love to Do and Do It

Focus on doing something you love.

When you’ve found what you’re passionate about, you get the motivation to keep you moving.

Learn How to Balance Life

If people think their job will lead to success, they might spend too much time on it and neglect other areas of their life.

Keep a balance between work, rest, health and life. 

10 more ideas

Every Decision In Life Becomes a Trade-Off
Every Decision In Life Becomes a Trade-Off

... and boils down to what we give up to attain something. Our mindsets are inclined towards pleasure and resistive towards pain. We normally like to think in terms of gai...

Good and Bad Decisions

Decisions are a cost-benefit analysis of risking something small for the opportunity to gain something big.

  • Good decisions can be: Exercising, meditating for 10 minutes daily, finding the courage and striking up a conversation with someone, applying for jobs that you may or may not get.
  • Bad decisions can be: lying or pretending to someone, driving unsafely, sending angry text messages, or staying up late drinking before an important meeting or exam in the morning.
Trade-offs and Life Values

Trade-offs are not something as simple as flipping a coin. Our values guide us towards what we want in life, and it is not the same for all. Example: Buying a house has a trade-off of mortgage for the next ten or more years. This is subjective and depends on what we value in life.

Indecisive people suffer because they don’t know their inner values and what they care about.

6 more ideas

Don't follow your passion
The main flaw of  “finding your passion” presupposes that interests and passions are fixed, rather than fluid and evolving as we age and gain wisdom and experience. 
The problem with following your passion
  • It ignores the market. Unless you have a trust fund waiting for you, you’ll have to feed yourself and others. 
  • It will turn a passion into a job. 
Learn from Startups
  1. Identify real needs in the market that are currently not being well met. 
  2. Assess your strengths: Whatever is easy for you that most others have a harder time with, that’s a worthy option.
  3. Match up these two in a constantly iterative process: This process takes many years if not decades.

2 more ideas

Emotional Validation
Emotional Validation
  • Many people need approval from others when it comes to one’s shortcomings and the inability to be perfect. It is comforting to seek and get some sort of validation, but ther...
Espace The Need For Outside Validation

To wean off the dependence on other people’s validation, we need to ask ourselves the following:

  1. Can I be responsible for myself today?
  2. If I was to complete only one task, what would I do?
  3. What solid evidence would there be to prove my productivity for the day?
  4. Can I strengthen an important relationship today?
The Need For Validation Never Really Goes Away

We will continue to seek the help of other people to get overcome difficult times, and that's ok. But we shouldn’t let that overpower our ability to think for ourselves.

There is great ease in knowing that your life reflects what’s most important to you.

Believing That Being Wrong Is a Failure

The best way to know what works and what doesn’t, is to fail a few times.

Smart people don’t fear being wrong because they know that being wrong is ultimately an instrument that pushes...

Thinking That Everything Is About You

Many of us obsess over “rejections” and ruminate on what we could have done differently. It’s more productive to realize that every disappointment or poor interaction is not actually about us. 

Successful people realize that every little thing – bad or good – is not a reflection of them or their self-worth.

Being E-Ready Every Minute of the Day

Smart people know that having a fulfilling life means having a life outside of work. And they make time for it. Obsessively checking work email at the dinner table is a good recipe for disaster. 

Set some time where your phone is off, and your attention is on the people right in front of you.

4 more ideas

The Definition of Rich
The Definition of Rich

A high income and a regular acquisition of expensive stuff do not necessarily make people rich. People may have a high income, but many won’t survive three months if they are suddenly without their...

Wealthy People and Pseudo Affluence

Wealthy people have sustainable access to money, often for a very long period of time. Their habits are now aligned with the wealth that they have incurred.

Pseudo affluence, on the other hand, is what people experience when they are currently earning lots of money and start to believe that they are rich. They pay for their expensive lifestyle with a high amount of borrowed money and are just a job-loss away from being poor again.

Object Poor

... is a ‘state of excess’ when the stuff we own makes us poor, as the debt we incur has trapped us to keep working our jobs to fund the expensive lifestyle and habits.

5 more ideas

An asshole

An asshole is someone who consistently makes the people around feeling humiliated, de-energized, disrespected, or oppressed.

Take responsibility

Some people are so thin-skinned that they think everyone is offending them when it's nothing personal. Other people are objectively treated like dirt everywhere because they're doing something to prompt that punishment.

We've got to take responsibility.

Consequences

Mean-spirited people need someone in their life to tell them they're contemptible.

In the very short-term, it might seem to your advantage to let someone feel like dirt. However, in most situations, we actually need collaboration and should be givers rather than takers. By being an asshole, you might be destroying your organization by driving out the best people, undermining their productivity, creativity, and so on.

3 more ideas