It's not comfortable to confront emotional experiences you're trying to avoid.
However, doing so is what you need. Gratitude journals, mindfulness meditation, seeing a therapist might be worth pursuing.

The advice you avoid is the advice you need

It is useful to remember that everyone is just winging it all the time. The lesson to be drawn is not that this will throw us in utter chaos, but that you, unconfident, self-conscious, potentially have as much to contribute to your field as anyone else.
You can improvise as you go, just like everyone else.

The solution to imposter syndrome

We should know when to stop doing something that's reached its natural endpoint, even if it means a great deal to us. 
We need to understand that the most creative choice would be to see what's next.

Know when to give up and move on

You may already know it won't kill you to endure the mild discomfort of starting a difficult conversation with a colleague or asking someone out. You know that it's possible to let that feeling rise and fade while doing the action anyway.
The rewards come so swiftly that this becomes a more appealing way to live.

Being able to tolerate minor discomfort

Much of our troubles arise from trying to control what is not in our control - such as the future. We want to know that things will work out later on. But we never can.
It's liberating to understand that no amount of worry will ever change this truth. A plan is only a statement of intent, not a guarantee that the future will obey your plan. This means not living each day, bracing yourself to see if things will work out as you desired.

The future will never be certain

Major personal decisions should be made not by asking if it will make you happy, but if this choice will enlarge or diminish you.
We are not good at predicting what will make us happy - it makes us concentrate on our narrow preferences for security and control. Focusing on enlargement questions draws out a more in-depth, intuitive response. You tend to know whether choosing to do something may bring short-term comfort that would prevent growth.

Choose growth over happiness

Spending your life helping others is a life well spent. While this is generally true, it gets tangled up with issues of guilt and self-esteem. 
If you think you should be helping more, you are probably better of doing something you're passionate about. That way, you kindle a fire that others can benefit from.

Selflessness is overrated

The demands on our time continue to increase, but our capacities remain mostly fixed. In an attempt to get on top of everything, we'll generate more tasks. 
The upside is that you don't have to feel guilty for failing to do it all, since doing it all is impossible. A good solution is to consciously choose what to neglect, in favour of what matters most.

There will always be too much to do

After more than a decade of writing life-changing advice, I know when to move on. Here’s what else I learned

Selflessness is overrated

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