Secrets to a (fairly) fulfilled life

You may already know it won't kill you to endure the mild discomfort of starting a difficult conversation with a colleague or asking someone out. You know that it's possible to let that feeling rise and fade while doing the action anyway.

The rewards come so swiftly that this becomes a more appealing way to live.

It's not comfortable to confront emotional experiences you're trying to avoid.

However, doing so is what you need. Gratitude journals, mindfulness meditation, seeing a therapist might be worth pursuing.

Much of our troubles arise from trying to control what is not in our control - such as the future. We want to know that things will work out later on. But we never can.

It's liberating to understand that no amount of worry will ever change this truth. A plan is only a statement of intent, not a guarantee that the future will obey your plan. This means not living each day, bracing yourself to see if things will work out as you desired.

It is useful to remember that everyone is just winging it all the time. The lesson to be drawn is not that this will throw us in utter chaos, but that you, unconfident, self-conscious, potentially have as much to contribute to your field as anyone else.

You can improvise as you go, just like everyone else.

Spending your life helping others is a life well spent. While this is generally true, it gets tangled up with issues of guilt and self-esteem.

If you think you should be helping more, you are probably better of doing something you're passionate about. That way, you kindle a fire that others can benefit from.

We should know when to stop doing something that's reached its natural endpoint, even if it means a great deal to us.

We need to understand that the most creative choice would be to see what's next.