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Why Trying to Be Less Awkward Never Works
When we focus on others during a conversation, we shift our attention outward and become at ease, relatively. Our exaggerated self-consciousness is gone and we become less awkward.
Keeping our mind on the goal and not on the process makes us avoid the self-focus vortex, and it also helps to take a deep breath and lighten up.
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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
Patience decreases negative emotions and conditions like anxiety and depression. It also increases empathy, generosity and compassion.
Patience as a personality trait can be cultivated and ...
Most of us have heard of the ‘fight or flight’ response while we face a problem, obstacle or danger. Impatience is the ‘fight’ part of the same.
Our brains have a set of nervous tissue called the Amygdalae which is not nuanced enough to understand that all threats and dangers are not the same, not requiring the same (extreme) reaction. If one can bifurcate between true danger and less-serious threats, it is a good start to control your emotions.
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Key Ideas
The problem with focusing on constant self-optimization is that it is a process without end. We can never say we've reached the full version of ourselves. We may feel that we a...
In a way, depression is our way of reacting, withdrawing, and possibly metaphorically recharging our batteries.
There's so much pressure in modern society to perform and be productive, to be efficient, that we don't get time to recharge. This leads to sadness and loss of energy.
We should stop trying to adjust people to circumstances that are not worth being adjusted to. If people suffer from stress in an organization, try to look at how work is organized and change it, instead of referring them to something like stress coaching, or psychotherapies or mindfulness exercises that are really just treating symptoms.
These sensitive, intelligent, resourceful people should be out changing the world, not just sitting in therapy rooms trying to improve themselves.
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Key Ideas
Constructive or healthy perfectionism is a personality trait that is associated with finding enjoyment and fulfilment from doing things well. The focus is process-oriented,...
A possible explanation of why people develop unhealthy perfectionism is that they grow up without a sense of support, safety, and nurturing. Another reason can be a reaction to childhood trauma or extreme cultural expectations, where appearing perfect is a strategy for survival.
The consequence of destructive perfectionism is often deep-seated emotional difficulties and unresolved traumatic experiences that might eventually turn into a potentially severe depression.