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How to Master the Art of Listening

Mistakes we make in conversations

Our general tendency is to:
  • Evaluate: We judge what someone is saying and agree or disagree.
  • Probe: We ask questions from our own frame of reference.
  • Advise: We give counsel, advice, and solutions to problems.
  • Interpret: We analyze others' motives and behaviors based on our own experiences.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

How to Master the Art of Listening

How to Master the Art of Listening

https://zapier.com/blog/become-a-better-listener/

zapier.com

3

Key Ideas

Listening requires mental work

We mistake listening as easy because it looks passive and instinctive, but in reality it’s hard work. Really listening (and not just appearing to listen) requires intense concentration and a good deal of mental energy.

Mistakes we make in conversations

Our general tendency is to:
  • Evaluate: We judge what someone is saying and agree or disagree.
  • Probe: We ask questions from our own frame of reference.
  • Advise: We give counsel, advice, and solutions to problems.
  • Interpret: We analyze others' motives and behaviors based on our own experiences.

What makes a great listener

  • Asking great questions;
  • Playing attention to the nonverbal communication;
  • Forgoing taking detailed notes to pay better attention;
  • Listening with the intent to understand, not the intent to respond;
  • Making people feel heard;
  • Following up on what matters.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Active listening

Is a technique for developing our ability to listen, to make a conscious effort to understand what people are really saying.

As a communication technique, it is used in many prof...

Core components of Active Listening

  • Comprehending: To communicate, we must first understand what the other person (or people) are actually saying.
  • Retaining: To respond in an appropriate manner, we must understand and retain what the other person has said.
  • Responding: An active response should show that we understand what the other person has said, have paid attention to their words and also read their non-verbal cues.

Improving Active Listening skills

  • Educate yourself on common cognitive biases and shortcuts;
  • Avoid trying to respond immediately. Allow the other person time to finish speaking, then provide a considered response;
  • Minimize conversational narcissism by keeping track of your use of pronouns(I, me);
  • Seek to develop a clear picture of the other person’s logic;

Tips To Improve Your Listening Skills

  1. Be fully present. Avoid distractions and multitasking, focusing exclusively on the other person.
  2. Ask a question to better understand and help the conversation go deeper.

Stephen R. Covey

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

Stephen R. Covey

The 5 Purposes Of Listening

  1. Listening makes people feel like they matter, which in turn makes them work harder.
  2. Arrogance talks. Humility listens. Practice humility by letting others speak.
  3. Listen to help others learn what they really think and find clarity.
  4. Listen to understand what needs to be acted upon.
  5. Curiosity. Listen to ask a question.

4 Reasons You Hate To Listen

  1. An attention span compromised by excess of stimulation.
  2. Nagging issues take over your mental space leaving little space for listening.
  3. Lack of empathy makes you ignore how other people feel when they are not heard.
  4. Conversational dominance and impatience.