Instead of dwelling on regrets, focus on self improvement.

Instead of dwelling on regrets, focus on self improvement.

If you try to ignore upsetting feelings like regret, it can diminish your joy or even manifest itself as physical pain. 

Instead, slow down, be aware of the present moment and what sensations you are feeling, and accept how you feel while understanding that this feeling won't last forever.

Regret is just a signal that improvement is possible.

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8 Ways to Be Kinder to Yourself in 2020

nytimes.com

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Enjoy things when they're good

Let go of negative expectations and accept that we can never perfectly prepare for a challenge.

Be present in the current moment and savor good experiences and feelings.

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Make more "casual" friends

Going through your day and greeting your neighbors, the barista, fellow members in a gym class, etc. makes you feel more connected and creates a feeling of belonging to a community.

These "weak ties":

  • improve our job prospects
  • can give us valuable recommendations
  • make us more empathetic

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Try doing nothing

Reject the idea of busyness as a status symbol. Not taking time to slow down can cause burnout, anxiety disorders, and stress-related health issues.

Doing nothing can recharge us and make us more productive when we get back into it.

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Enjoy your "guilty pleasures"

Sometimes we need a mental break and not always be working on solving intellectual problems or doing something "productive".

If a TV show or song is enjoyable to you, why feel embarassed or guilty about it?

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Spend more time alone

This is commonly viewed as a negative experience but actually has lots of benefits, like:

  • Benefiting social relationships
  • Improving creativity and confidence
  • Making you better at regulating emotions

When you feel stressed out, try taking some time for yourself to recharge and reflect.

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Even if you've experienced something before, don't assume that you have experiened all the joy that there is to gain from it!

Novelty is often overrated.

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Looking at your accomplishments positively decreases stress and encourages better habits!

Accept compliments that others give you and give yourself compliments as well.

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RELATED IDEAS

According to experts, choosing to spend time by yourself can help your social relationships. Solitude can also help you regulate your emotions. It can have a calming effect that prepares you to better engage with others.

Learn to identify moments when you need solitude to recharge and reflect to help with negative emotions and experiences.

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8 Ways to Be Kinder to Yourself in 2020

nytimes.com

Fear of Better Options (F.O.B.O.)

F.O.B.O is our inability to decide between different options all of which are decent. It can lead us to paralysis when we’re in the process of making a decision.

F.O.B.O. means obsessively researching every possible alternative, when faced with a decision, fearing we’ll miss out on the best one. It can lead to indecision, regret and is a serious threat to our happiness.

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How to Beat F.O.B.O., From the Expert Who Coined It

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Depression During Holidays

Holidays are supposed to be a happy time, but many people feel sadness due to heightened expectations, family rifts and comparison with others.

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Yes, It's O.K. to Be Sad During the Holidays

nytimes.com