Validation is the key to shutting down a complainer initially.

Do not roll your eyes or check your email. Rather say things like "I hear you." Complainers can wear themselves out in five minutes unless you ignorantly add fuel to the fire by suggesting a solution. Then the...

• Validate: Now that you've shown them you're listening, you can deploy the ultimate weapons for shutting chronic complainers down.
• Next, it's time to sympathize. Try to make it as authentic as possible. Avoid all sarcasm as they will notice it, and...

You can't change somebody's behaviour, but you can control how you handle them over time.

• Don't ever tell them that things "aren't so bad" as this gives the message that you're not taking their pain seriously.
• Don't ever complain about the complainer...

If it is essential that if you have to disagree with a chronic complainer, you can ask this simple question: "Do you want my opinion?"

The complainer then has to give you permission to share a different perspective, but don't try to convince them. Say "I hear what you'...

Many chronic complainers are not looking for advice even though they want to share their problems.

If they ask for advice, it's best to keep it short and on point. They may reject your help after they ask for it, saying it is useless or irrelevant. As annoying as it can be...