Learn more about personaldevelopment with this collection
Strategies for building self-confidence
Techniques for embracing your strengths and accomplishments
Tips for seeking support and feedback
When lifelong dreams crumble
All of us have hopes and dreams for the future that become part of our identity. But then reality gets in the way. Your passion may fade, or the obstacles to realising the dream may become too big to overcome. You may have feelings of regret and failure, or fear how others will judge you.
We should take comfort in knowing that being adaptable and flexible in our ambitions is just as important as being gritty and determined.
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Goal adjustment capacity
Psychologists see goal adjustment capacity as a beneficial form of 'self-regulation' or 'self-management.'
It contains two parts:
- The ability to disengage from fruitless goals
- The ability to know when and how to change to new, m...
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Find a new passion
When letting go of an impossible dream, you're freeing yourself up for a potentially more rewarding project.
If you dreamed of playing professional football, you could become a coach (and still play for your local club at the weekends). Or you might find a completely diffe...
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Be realistic about what you're giving up
Giving up your dream will hurt, at least for a time. To drop this vision of your future-self is to drop a piece of you.
To help you move on, It helps to focus on the negative implications of your dream. If we are realistic, many of our dreams are r...
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Come to terms with your decision
As you let go of your dream, you may fear you're making a mistake.
- There's no calculus for knowing when to give up. If pursuing your dream comes at great personal cost to your relationships and other goals in life (which is different from a 'harmonious passion'), tha...
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Moving on from past dreams
You can relieve the sense of regret you feel about giving up a dream by doing the following exercise:
- On the first day, spend some time writing about friends and peers you know have regrets about dreams they've let go.
- On day two, write abou...
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