Make It Last

Ways you can protect your relationship:

• Avoid opportunity. Avoid situations that could lead to bad decisions, such as late nights with colleagues.
• Plan ahead for temptation. Remind yourself of steps you will take to avoid temptation and protect your relationship.
• Picture your beloved. Focus on loving thoughts and the joy of your family.
• Keep your relationship interesting.

Romantic and passionate love can fade over time and mature into a committed love.

Couples can rekindle the sparks of early courtship simply by doing something novel together. Studies show that partners who regularly share new experiences report greater boosts in marital happiness.

Fights about money are really about a couple's values and shared goals and seldom about finances itself.

• Be honest about all your spending.
• Maintain some financial independence. Both sides can have their discretionary pot of money to spend on whatever they want.
• Invest in the relationship. When you do have money to spend, spend it on the relationship.

The top three predictors of a happy marriage among parents are:

• Sexual intimacy
• Commitment to the relationship.
• Generosity. It's about sharing, caring and kind gestures you make toward your partner every day.

Learn to fight constructively. The aim is to leave you feeling better about your partner.

• Identify the complaint, not the criticism.
• Avoid "you" phrases. '"You never" and "You always" followed by criticism.
• Consider your pronouns. Starting your sentence with "I" or "We" will help identify problems, rather than blaming.
• Body language. No eye-rolling, folded arms, or crossed legs. Look at your partner when you speak.
• Learn to de-escalate. Useful phrases include "What if we...", "I hear what you're saying..."

• Romantic love: Based on passion and sexual attraction
• Best friends: Fondness and deep affection
• Logical: Practical feelings based on shared values, financial goals, religion etc.
• Playful: Elicit feelings by flirtation or feeling challenged
• Possessive: Jealousy and obsession
• Unselfish: Nurturing, kindness, and sacrifice

In our most committed relationship, we feel a combination of two or three different forms of love. Understanding what forms of love your partner appreciates can help your relationship.

Good relationships take commitment and effort.

The challenge for couples is cultivating a mature and trusting love that is the key to a lasting relationship.

Committed couples do have more sex than everyone else. But Americans who are not having that much physical intimacy are just as happy as their more active counterparts.

Sexual frequency declines 3.2 percent a year after the age of 25. But the good news is that what married couples lack in quantity they make up for in quality. *